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The Power of Positive Doing

Last weekend, I watched the Grateful Dead documentary, “Long Strange Trip.” After tour manager Sam Cutler left the band in 1974, the band’s founder Jerry Garcia, anti-authoritarian to the core, who detested the role of “boss,” steadfastly refused to acknowledge himself as the band’s leader. At that point in the film, director Amir Bar-Lev asked,…

Have you ever applied for a job that you really wanted … only to be crushed and disappointed when you didn’t get it? Me too. Dozens of time. I felt frustrated when I didn’t get what I wanted. I’ve been fired and laid off, too. It’s painful. It hurt my feelings, frustrated my ambitions, and…

The Buddha was the smartest psychologist I’ve ever read. Over 2500 years ago he was teaching people about the human mind so that they might better understand themselves and discover how to stop their own suffering. Buddha wasn’t a god or a messiah – he was simply a very wise teacher with keen insights into human…

My mother died five months ago, after more than ten years with Alzheimer’s. I was her primary caregiver for the last six of those years and we grew very close during that time. We had always had a close relationship over the years but there was something about the intimate nature of caregiving that drew…

My wise friend Jaime Jusidman once told me the story of a young woman with a suitor who loved her very much. The suitor came to her door clutching a bouquet of daisies to give her. “Where are my roses?” she demanded. “I want roses.” Her suitor turned and went away. The next week he was…

There once was a land where people were always right. They knew they were right and they were proud of it. It was a land where people stated with confidence, “I am right and you are wrong.” These were words of conviction, courage, strength, and moral certainty. No one was ever heard to say: “I…

I called my friend Sam Beasley to complain about the injustice: “I just got word that my friend Kathryn has been diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer. She’s only sixty-eight years old. She’s been sober for thirty years; she hasn’t had a cigarette in twenty-nine years; and she hasn’t eaten sugar for twenty-eight years. She…

“Hell is other people,” wrote the French existential philosopher, Jean Paul Sartre. He was right, but only half right. The other half is, “Heaven is other people, too.” Yes, it is our relationships with other people that give us most of our headaches. However, relationships also give us joy. Isn’t it funny how everyone thinks that…

I recall a wonderful sermon I heard some years ago, by Vic Pentz, a Presbyterian pastor who led a small congregation in Southern California. Vic was a handsome guy, with the sturdy physique of an athlete. The way he tugged and pushed at his collar and shoulder indicated that football may have been one of…

“What a concept!” I marveled to myself as I read my friend Janelle Barlow’s book, A Complaint is a Gift.  It’s a business book about customer service and the importance of getting feedback – especially negative feedback – from customers.  Janelle asserts that complaints are not problems to be avoided – complaints are actually gifts…
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