Christine Arylo: How to Fall in Love with Yourself
Beliefnet talks to Christine Arylo, the author of Choosing Me Before We, about the romantic adventure of self-love.
BY: Jennifer E. Jones
“We’ve been trained especially as women for centuries to believe that putting yourself first is selfish,” she says. “When you look up the definition of self love, the current definition is conceit, vanity and narcissism. So we’re really shifting a way of viewing. The second reason why I think it’s so hard for women is because they just don’t really understand love. We think of love as something that we get from something versus something we have inside of ourselves and have access to all the time.”
Christine eventually met Noah, the man she calls "Walking Love". She discovered that even in a relationship, the need for self-love was just as important. “I remember a few weeks into dating, he said to me, ‘Christine, I don’t know what’s going to happen between the two of us, but you have to raise your standard for men. You can’t like a man just because he’s nice to you. Men are supposed to be nice to you.' I looked at him like he just told me that he could walk on water. I had just been assuming that it was okay to be disrespected. It was okay to be verbally or emotionally abused and that was different than being in an unhealthy relationship. All these things I had accepted because I also did them to myself.”
Today, Christine spreads her self-love revolution through her life coaching company Dare to Live You. She also has an online community, GirlTalk, where women discuss real issues. She has her own line of jewelry for women to wear their love in style. She’s working on her second book Madly in Love with Me: The Daring Adventure to Being Your Own Best Friend due in Spring 2012. She’s a busy woman, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. “It’s the best job ever to be able to teach love,” she says.
Through her spiritual journey that continues to unfold, Christine Arylo’s message remains the same and it springs from the vows she made to herself: "You really have to love yourself first. Honor yourself first. Trust yourself first. You have to develop a partnership with yourself first."
Want more? Read "Christine Arylo on Learning to Love Yourself after Loss"