GN writes:
Is the present marriage that I am in likely to end, when, under what circumstances, and will there be another for me, and when?
Your question is a particularly complicated one to answer, but very typical of what an astrologer deals with on a regular basis.
Astrology is not entirely fatalistic and mechanical. You can’t move the planets around but you can choose how you respond to the conditions they present. When we are talking about a relationship, when you’re dealing with the free will and choices of two people instead of one — and then add on the mechanics of the astrology — what you get is a strange combination of clockwork and chaos. It’s a bit like a cyclone: wildly variable, yet bound by predictable rules. Here is an instructional song that nicely describes what I’m trying to convey:
You can tell a lot about a person’s past, present, and future love life when taking a knowledgeable look at the birth chart. Even without seeing the birth chart of the partner or potential partner, an astrologer can tell a lot about what has going on or is likely to go on in the future with your romance(s).
This may sound strange but: although I know a great deal about astrological compatibility, it doesn’t come up as much as you might think when I’m looking at a relationship doing a reading. Did you just meet someone three weeks ago and you’re crazy about him or her? Well, you probably think that person is attractive, and you’ll find that when comparing the two birth charts. Married someone 5 years ago and now he or she is being an absolute jerk? Yes, there’s going to be reasons for that in the birth charts too. That’s kind of a no-brainer.
The person you have a great first date with and the one you fall in love with and the one you married and the one who disappointed you and the one you can’t wait to divorce are all in fact exactly the same person, and so are you. We also change and grow as people over time. Your actual birth chart may not actually change, but the transits to it bring the circumstances under which that growth and change happens, and those transits will tell you all sorts of things about where your head and heart are right now that the birth chart alone simply can’t.
***
When we use astrology to look at the mechanics of your love life, there are four places we usually look first:
- The condition of the Fifth House (romance) and its ruler
- The condition of the Seventh House (committed relationships) and its ruler
- The condition of Venus and Jupiter (which are the “natural” rulers of love and commitment)
Ultimately, every planet has a role to play in your love life. Without Mercury there’s no communication, without Mars there’s no sex, without Saturn there’s no structure, and so on. And that’s just your birth chart. When you add another person’s chart, the difficulty of calculation doesn’t double — it’s multiplied.
Please note: there are some astrologers out there who would answer a question like yours with something like “you have Venus in Aries, so you can’t maintain a relationship anyway, so ditch your mate immediately” or “you have Jupiter in the 7th House, so your relationships will always be great!” or “your mate’s Mars in Cancer makes him/her a hyper-defensive jerk, so run away” or something equally glib. Your best move it to run, not walk, away from that kind of advice. Any astrologer who pumps out that sort of pap on a regular basis probably has had far fewer successful relationships (or far more unsuccessful ones) than he or she is letting on.
So, have you gotten the impression now that relationships are complex, and that the astrology involved is going to be complicated too? Good. I wouldn’t want to mislead you. That’s no way to make a relationship work, is it?
Next time: we strap on the protective gear and wade deep into the heart of where your marriage is going.