(Neptune is in Pisces, and is currently conjunct the South Node, as it has been for about a month now, and has another month or so to go. This is like a double dose of delusion. Lucky you, you’re totally immune to that sort of thing, aren’t you?)

NEPTUNE:
Hey, how you doing?

YOU:
Feeling pretty confident, thanks for asking.

NEPTUNE:
It’s the drugs.

YOU:

What? What drugs? I’m not on any drugs.

NEPTUNE:
Sure you are. All day long.

YOU:
No I’m not! That’s nonsense.

NEPTUNE:
Sure you are.

YOU:
What??? You’re insane.

NEPTUNE:
No. You’re high as a kite at least half the day and you don’t even know it.

YOU:
Nonsense. I can still operate machinery and walk a straight line. I do that sort of thing all the time!

NEPTUNE:
I’m not talking about those kinds of drugs.

YOU:
Drugs are for losers. Drugs are for people who can’t cope with reality.

NEPTUNE:
You’re so high you don’t even know it.

YOU:
I’m ending this conversation right now.

NEPTUNE:
Of course. You’re busy. You’re busy with Facebook games and re-posting any old nonsense you find that agrees with your preconceptions. You’re busy shouting at the people who post political opinions that are different than yours, and who are using the same kinds of un-sourced nonsense to back their arguments that you use to back yours… because of course “the mainstream media” is just in it for the money, but there’s no way one yo-yo with a web site could possibly make money off of feeding people the lies they crave, is there? Then you repost other people’s memes that distort those fabrications even more. You’re busy yelling about how all the cancer and Alzheimer’s is a result of modern living — without realizing that more people are getting those things because fewer people are being killed off sooner by infected wounds and accidents and polio. But that’s okay, because if you do get cancer or Alzheimer’s you’ll just rub some cinnamon on it because natural medicine is awesome, right? You’re busy playing Candy Smash while your world descends into lunacy.

Like I said… DRUGS.

YOU:
(long silence)

NEPTUNE:
Don’t forget to vote on Tuesday.

YOU:
Shut up. I’m trying to do a quiz to find out which Game Of Thrones character I am…

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