Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life
& Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author
of “The Law of Sobriety” which
uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your
copy of “Manifest Holistic
Health
” from Sherry’s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars,
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A lot of people are talking today; it seems they have a lot to say. Enter
reality television, talk shows and blogs galore (yes, I’m aware of the irony of
that last example). And while there is nothing wrong with putting your ideas out
there, the other side of the equation – listening – often gets lost along the
way.

Meredith Watkins, MFT, a psychotherapist in San Diego, states, “One of the most valuable
gifts you can give people is genuinely listening to them. It’s amazing to me how
simple, yet effective that can be in helping others heal. One of the most
frequent comments I get from clients is, ‘I feel so much better just talking
about this.’”

But active listening is a skill. Eleanor Roosevelt wrote about how to become more
proficient at listening in her book, You Learn By Living:
“If you approach each new person you meet
in a spirit of adventure, you will find that you become increasingly interested
in them and endlessly fascinated by the new channels of thought and experience
and personality that you encounter…
If such a search is to be successful, however, you will need two qualities which you can develop by
practice. One is the ability to be a good listener. The other is the imaginative
ability to put yourself in the other person’s place; to try to discover what he
is thinking and feeling…I used to think that the reason my husband’s
fireside chats were so successful was largely that he had learned to state
complicated questions in a clear and simple way so that no one could fail to
understand him.”

This, I believe, is no small point. Is it possible that
one of the most respected and beloved president in recent history was successful
because he listened and empathized with those he met? And made the effort to
communicate in such a way that the listener would truly understand? This is
something any of us can do at any time.

Acknowledge those around you: look them in the eye and let them know they are seen and respected, simply for
being.

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