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Beyond Blue

As a graduate student pursuing a degree in theology twelve years ago, I took a course called Systematic Theology–by far my toughest class–by a brilliant professor who was dying of bone marrow cancer. No one knew she was dying. She kept her diagnosis to herself and, as best as she could, covering up her chemotherapy…

I can’t remember all the speeches at my commencement ceremony. But I do remember looking up on the stage to see my best friend, the valedictorian of our class, sitting there among all the luminaries, and wondering how in the world she did that when English was her second language. It still blows me away. …

It’s tempting for anyone who writes about depression and anxiety to preach from hindsight, after he has “recovered” from his mood disorder: “This is what I did to free myself from addiction” … “Here are five steps to instant weight loss” … “These are eight techniques to cure anxiety.” If you look at the list…

Last year this time I delivered the Commencement address to my alma mater, Saint Mary’s College in Notre Dame, Indiana. Since it is graduation season, I thought I’d repost it. Thank you, President Mooney. And thank you to all the professors and staff of Saint Mary’s, especially those who have changed my life: Joe Incandela,…

For a long while I was afraid to write things such as “I am mentally ill” or “I am bipolar.” I was afraid of labels. By calling myself a manic-depressive would I trap my psyche in “sick” mode? By accepting my diagnosis of bipolar disorder, would I prevent healing? By writing the words “I am…

“On Wednesday, I will leave my husband of twelve years. He is a depressive. He uses prescribed medication and has available to him a phalanx of good therapists. But he also self-medicates with alcohol. He disdains therapy. He refuses to confront his disease.” She communicated this partly as a response to my MLK piece (on…

I love this tale from India, retold here by Mary Dessein. What a beautiful way of thinking about our illness, frustrating life situations, or crosses we bear. A water-bearer carries two large pots on a yoke across his shoulders up the hill from the river to his master’s house each day. One has a crack…

I have decided to dedicate a post on Thursday to therapy, and offer you the many tips I have learned on the couch. They will be a good reminder for me, as well, of something small I can concentrate on. Many of them are published in my book, “The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit.”…

In “Being Perfect,” bestselling author Anna Quindlen advises high school and college graduates to work from a clean slate … to give up on being perfect. I keep the gift book beside my computer (with Miguel Ruiz’s “The Four Agreements” and many other books, information hoarder that I am) as a constant reminder to be…

A classic that I like to post on Beyond Blue every now and then … One day I decided to quit…I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality…. I wanted to quit my life. I went to the woods to have one last talk with God. “God”, I said. “Can you give me one good…
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