Yesterday, I saw a meme on Facebook that showed a woman sitting up in bed, yelling out to no one in particular “Somebody pamper me!” and then in the next block, she realizes “Oh yeah. I forgot. I’m a strong, independent woman. Shit.” Can I ever relate?

As much as I love being nurtured, like many women, I don’t allow for enough time being pampered. Somehow I have absorbed the cultural belief that it is indulgent to engage in it. Not productive. A waste of time. How silly is that? Even machines require maintenance for optimal functioning. I can tell when my good self care meter is running a quart (or more) low. I feel irritable and cranky. I feel like snapping at someone, even if I don’t actually let the words fly. I experience fatigue and need to push myself to complete tasks.

Yesterday was one of those days. I had stuff to do, such as write articles, run errands, see a client, wash clothes, plan for a workshop I am facilitating tomorrow, and host my weekly radio show called It’s All About Relationships.

In the past month or so, I have experienced the deaths of a few friends; one this week whose service is tomorrow. I anticipate a bitter sweet time, since he and I were co-workers at a counseling center I left a year ago to take my new job as a writer.  I haven’t seen many of my colleagues since then. I know that tears and hugs will be in abundance.

In preparation for all of that, I spent the morning getting a pedicure under the capable, experienced and relaxing hands of Amy as we spoke about our children, careers, world view, life and death. Things that matter.

After that, I got my hair cut, which I enjoy too. I imagine that as my salt and pepper locks (tinged with purple; the remnants of which have stuck around for the past week or so), fall to the floor, to be swept away, so too does my excess baggage. Juanita knows just how to create a look that I love as I lighten up.

I also receive a relaxing monthly massaaaahhhge from my friend Ruthanne Wood who knows just how to get the right spots sighing. A bonus treat this month was a visit from another healing friend Cindy Greb who had trekked Eastward from Colorado. I couldn’t miss the opportunity to immerse myself in deep peace while on her table. For the past four weeks, I have already and for another six weeks, will be experiencing Facial Reflex Therapy sessions with another friend Deva Troy. Insight comes along with the youthing effect of the modality. I have been writing about the time on the table and beyond, here on the Bliss Blog.

When once upon a time, I viewed these as optional, I now see them as a necessary part of my health care; as much as going to the gym, listening to music, eating healthfully, taking my cardiac meds, being in nature, hanging out with kindred spirits, reading and writing. When I do these things, I feel a sense of renewal in body, mind and spirit.

Now the trick is to allow for it on a daily basis, accepting offers when people extend them, taking time to BE. For too long, I was ‘doing my strong woman number.’