Those words came to me, as many do, via Divine Inspiration. So easy at times to allow for turmoil and chaos when surrender is called for. Not easy for this recovering co-dependent/workaholic for whom holding on is at odds with letting go as I engage in a mental tug of war. Have you ever seen the poster of a cat that reads, “Everything I ever let go of had claw marks on it.”? Yup, that’s me at times.  I wonder what has me clinging tenaciously to ideas that are threadbare and worn when I would be better off exchanging them for shiny new ones.

Today I was sharing with a new friend that I sometimes read my journals from college years (1977-1981) and shake my head in amazement at some of what I believed back then. What is even more astonishing is that I sometimes still believe some of the things that didn’t serve me in my youth and still don’t to this day. Yes, I have matured or as my friend, Yvonne describes it “ripened”. And I know I am a work in progress.

We all have baggage. Some are steamer trunk size. Some are carry-on that can fit in the overhead compartment or under the seat in front of you. I like to think mine are in the latter category. And yet there are still items I want to offload to streamline my journey.

What I release:

Fear of the future

Regrets from the past

Anger

Worry

Anything I can’t control

Unnecessary weight both physical and emotional

Self deprecation

Doubt

Powerlessness

Judgment of myself and others

What I can’t change

Frustration with lack of control

Inner turmoil

Drama

The residual impact of trauma

The compulsion to multitask

Workaholism

Feeling responsible for the happiness of others

Savior behavior: thinking I need to fix, save, heal, cure and kiss the boo-boos to make them better

Expectation

Critiholism

Perfectionism

Making myself wrong for wanting what I do

Only asking for what I think people will say yes to

Soul contracts that limit me

Emotional vampires

Overachieving

Denial of my own pain and challenges

The need to be right

Envy of people who are living lives that I want

Believing  that I am not enough or too much

Impatience

Another analogy that comes to me is that of holding water or sand. If I close my fist around either, the substance will slip through my fingers. If I carry them with an open hand, they remain with me. I welcome life with an open hand and open heart.