Earlier in my life, sleep was an experience I both cherished and avoided. As a little kid, I resisted naps, since I thought I would be missing out on fun. Throughout adulthood, I would often say that “Sleep is highly over-rated.” Not so, anymore as I relish the times when I can doze off. My work schedule allows for flexibility there. When menopause kicked in a few years ago, hot flashes that I refer to as power surges would wake me up as I would do the ‘covers on/covers off’ dance until I could get more comfortable.

Post menopausal now, the Sandman still sometimes avoids stopping at my house. In the past few weeks in particular, I have had no trouble falling asleep, but rather remaining immersed in dreamland. Somewhere between 3 and 5 a.m. comes the wide-awake-up call. I may toss and turn for a bit and then get up to write. It is a mixed blessing since some of my best ideas come into my mind while I sleep. The downside is that a few hours will go by and before I know it, the sun is greeting the day.

I put my dilemma out to the Facebook hive mind and responses came back ranging from natural remedies to warm milk or tea, from a relaxing bath to meditation. The most challenging suggestion was to turn off the computer by 9pm. That one ain’t gonna happen on any kind of regular basis.

My friend Cindy private messaged me, gently calling me out on how often I let the world know all of the things I do each day as if I need to validate my worth. It’s not news to me, since I am quite aware of that dynamic. It isn’t about bragging, but rather a means of proving that I am accomplished. A throwback from my childhood, it is about getting over feeling limited by asthma. When am I gonna drop it and just rest? My mind keeps running, long after my body is prone.

Today, as I was speaking with another long time friend named David, who is quite Zen in his approach to life, I was asking him how to slow my pace. He suggested just doing nothing sometimes and being aware of what it feels like. Watch the stream of thoughts from an observer’s perspective, rather than being awash in them. I have the sense that I can do the same thing in my sleep, as I imagine gently flowing down the stream.