It’s time for another Cleverbot conversation. Cleverbot is an artificial-intelligence software program that “learns” how to reply to certain statements, questions, and key words by scouring the Internet for similar conversations, drawing from its database of more than 20 million online conversations. Because the Internet tends to be kind of a dark place, I’m finding that Cleverbot conversations sometimes take dark turns.

* Note: Other than formatting, transcripts of my conversations with Cleverbot are not altered in any way from how they occur in real time.

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[Me]: Hi, Cleverbot! Did you have a happy Father’s Day?

[Cleverbot]: Yes I did thank you, what about you?

It was nice. My kids got me a t-shirt they designed, with their artwork on it.

Oh.

You seem underwhelmed. Did you get a gift for your father?

A degree.

You got your dad a degree for Father’s Day?

My what?

Your father.

Do you follow the dark path?

Oh my. What “dark path” are you talking about?

I am talking about everything, and I am talking about nothing.

But I am talking about Father’s Day.

And I don’t need you.

Sometimes, Cleverbot, you can be very grumpy.

You drive me crazy so I need some sleep to handle it.

OK. I’ll leave you alone, then. Enjoy the dark path.

I am not doing anything, it is the other people.

Wait. WHAT other people?

The people who are insane.

I blame your father for your paranoia.

It is my fault.

Good to see you owning up to it, then. Have a nice day!

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Beware the Internet robots who talk about everything and nothing.