There are a lot of ways to show gratitude and respect for your children. Very few of them involve what you inscribe on your gravestone, because, as a rule, it’s probably better to appreciate your kids while you’re alive. They’d rather you hear you say how proud you are of them than read about it on a granite marker.

Anyway, never do this. Never ever.

Even if one of your 12 kids is internationally known enough to, um, name a college after himself.

[H/T: JesusNeedsNewPR]