For if you forgive others their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 6:12, 14-15.

A good rule to live by, but sometimes it’s hard to forgive. It takes strength and courage to forgive someone who has wronged you, abused you, or neglected you. It takes even more strength and courage to forgive yourself.

Too often we forgive others before we even think about forgiving ourselves. If your inner light is being destroyed by guilt, despair, and anger, then you must consider why you are hurting yourself. You need to look at the source of your negative, self defeating emotions. Why are you really punishing yourself? Is that guilt necessary or is it time to move past whatever caused the guilt?

You need to feel it in your soul.

God is love. Jesus told his followers that God loves everyone. Full stop. There are no exceptions. Even when we sin or make mistakes, God forgives. Of course, we’re not all forgiving like God. Our emotions and actions often take us into darkness. All that means is, you have to put in the effort to make forgiveness work.

You can’t just say, “I forgive you.” You need to mean those words. Feel them in your soul. Otherwise, its just empty words.

Forgiveness takes time and effort. You must put in the emotional and mental time it takes to get past pain, despair, guilt, and anger. Sometimes forgiving someone or yourself takes years. However long it takes, the process of forgiveness brings healing.

Heal yourself.

The entire process of forgiving is about healing. It’s about healing your inner self. It’s about healing relationships with others.

You need to see the person or event for what it really is. Clear away your deeply set ideas, or prejudices. Find the truth in the situation. See the pain inflicted on both sides of an argument. Reconnect with the real you. Accept who you are, and who others are. Realize God has forgiven you, and that you are a good person.

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