Depression is a heaviness of the soul.
When I feel depressed, my entire body feels its weight plus more.
My arms dangle because if I try to lift them, it takes all my energy.
My core feels like a dull rod has been staked through it.
I muster my strength to do what I must.
If I cry, then my whole body shuts down once more. My eyelids close, the world blocked out from a mind overwhelmed and distraught.
I cannot imagine anyplace to go for help, nor do I want to go because it hurts when I move.
I cry and moan inwardly that no one cares or respects my presence in this world.
I feel alone.
There can be many people all around me, there might only be one. But I feel compelled to believe the pain that tells me I am alone.
So I sit and huddle with pain. Despair joins and I feel wounded and alone.
published with permission from Terezia Farkas (copyright December, 2013).
Find me on twitter @tereziafarkas