Social media outlets have been ablaze with buzz about the gross and shocking “performance” of Miley Cyrus on MTV’s Video Music Awards. I watched and was deeply saddened. While Miley bopped around the stage like a porn star, others were also pushing the envelope of decency.

You know I love Lady Gaga’s talent, but her clam shell thong focused attention more on her naked bottom. And she sat in that costume for the whole show. Awkward. The male presenters did not comment on her talent, but on her naked derriere, not her creativity or her amazing vocal chops.

Darling Selena Gomez wore a dress with one side of her top practically see-through. She looked beautiful without nearly revealing a breast! Again pushing the envelope to say, “Hey, I am all grown up!”

Cyrus got the memo–In order to be taken seriously as an adult star, you have to shed the clothes, create the lust factor and feature your body, not your talent. Cyrus just went over the top and blurred her lines of “decency.”  While she is getting all the negativity, one must ask, where did she learn to do this?

From her predecessors and peers who push their fame by selling sex, despite their talent. Beyonce doesn’t have to gyrate like a sex object on stage to showcase her talent. But she does.

Jennifer Lopez felt compelled to sex it up on her performance on American Idol, a moment when parents were covering the eyes of young faces.

What about Vanessa Hudgen’s new movie in which she pole dances–another rite of passage to more serious roles?

Queen bee Madonna, and so many more….it’s a pattern that Miley had to notice.

I know stars want to grow out of their teen idol status, but do they have to do so by taking off their clothes or acting lewd? It seems to be the Hollywood way. To be serious, to be adult, to be mature, become a sex object!

So that is the conversation to have with yourself, your daughters, your grandkids. The rite of passage into adulthood is not turning yourself into a sex object, unless of course, you are the porn industry or media producers who want to capitalize on sexuality to sell your music, movie or product. And yes, this impacts our teens who feel they have to become girls gone wild to enter adulthood.

Women are being sold a lie–This is not the way to showcase talent or transition to adulthood.  It undermines your real talent and that was the tragedy of VMAs. There was lots of true talent lost in the indecency.

Pray for Miley Cyrus. She’s lost, trying to find her way in a business that pushes this type of envelope. Hopefully, she will make better choices in the future and have someone to advise her who looks truly cares about her, not the almighty dollar.

The root here is major insecurity and lack of a true identity. The corrective factor? A relationship with Christ. He has the best for His kids and they have to prove nothing. Just accept the love and grace.