Every day, just living our lives, we face a number of opportunities to test our character. Often, our true self comes out in the small things; the everyday trials, frustrations or simple irritations. It’s in those moment, we see ourselves for who we really are and can decide if we need to make changes. Do we become easily offended, stressed, upset and sweat the small stuff? Do we go bananas over bananas? Let me explain!

I go to the grocery store to buy bananas.

I pay for them, drive home, put away my groceries only to find there are no bananas in my bags–seriously? the bag boy missed my bananas!

Now I can respond to this several ways.

• Being the calm, full of compassion, and understanding psychologist, I can say, “Oh the bagger forgot my bananas, well, mistakes happen, it’s ok.
• I could get really angry and say, “Man, you can’t depend on anyone to do anything right these days.
• I could swear to never go back to that store again. NO bananas, NO business!
• I could just swear and call the clerk all kinds of names.
• I could obsess on my lost bananas all day and ruminate on the fact that now I have no bananas and no time to return to the store.
• Hey, I could just go bananas!

It’s a small stress, a small grievance, a source of irritation, but my response to it can move me forward in my day or get me emotionally stuck. Small stuff can add up to big problems if left unchecked. Anger from constant frustrations prompt more anger and does damage to the physical body and one’s spiritual health.

Now banana frustration is relatively minor and honestly I don’t see too many people in counseling over this. I don’t run Banana Loss support groups, But frustrations happen everyday and we can become emotionally stuck if our response arouses us and brings on more anger. The key here is to approach the small stuff with grace and respond well. Our mental health depends on it!

So for  every “banana” in your life, remember, it’s only a banana and not worth the upset it may cause.