These past weeks, many have witnessed community violence in their neighborhoods and cities. As a result, you may feel grief and even anger at these incidents. The reason for this is that grief involves loss. When violence is in a community you experience the loss of safety, the loss of trust in those who live in your community and the loss of trust of local government.
Each person responds differently to grief. Some become empty and numb. Others become angry, have nightmares, withdraw socially and may lose motivation to go to do work or school.
We also know that witnessing violence and death can be traumatic for children and cause mental health problems. They made experience depression, post traumatic stress, anxiety, aggression, hopelessness and risky behavior. Because of this, they need adults talking to them about incidents of violence and helping them cope. Specifically, children can be helped to cope by:
- Encouraging them to identify their feelings including sadness and grief.
- Keeping routines in your household –predictability is important when things feel unsafe.
- Encouraging play and laughter in your home.
- Limiting their exposure to news and violence on media.
- Making sure they sleep and eat well.
In terms of the larger community, honor those who have died and find meaning in their deaths so the community can move forward. You often see memorials as a way to remember that change is needed to prevent more people from dying at the hands of violence. Then, set up a community advisory group or appoint a local leader who can liaise with law enforcement and other agencies in order to make needed changes. Include the faith community in the process. Together, we need dialogue and solutions.
*This is information was adapted from the SAMSHA Tips for Survivors: Coping with Grief After Community Violence
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