Couples come in to therapy with this complaint. “I did nice things for my spouse, but it doesn’t seem to matter. She doesn’t even notice. I don’t get it.” Honestly, they usually don’t get it. They fail to see that all the negativity of the relationship sort of cancels out the good when it happens.…

John and Mary are at it again. Arguing escalates to anger and John has a hard time calming down. As they sit in my therapy office, they ask what needs to happen. Basically, here is a summary: 1) John needs to admit that his anger is out of control. While anger is a normal emotion…

I was in the grocery store yesterday and the tabloids were headlining the secret love child of yet another celebrity couple. While we tend to expect this from celebrity relationships, secrets are a problem for any couple. The question asked is if it is a good idea to reveal those secrets to your partner. Let’s…

It’s toxic. It can be sexual, but doesn’t have to be. It can be present and you may  not be aware of it. It’s at the heart of failing relationships. The secret relationship killer is betrayal. And betrayal isn’t always about infidelity. It has different faces like when a husband thinks more about his career…

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