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Doing Life Together

Situation comedies are the worst when it comes to portraying relationships. Typically we see the “I don’t have a clue” husband whose wife is constantly telling him what to do. While we may laugh at this comedy routine, there is nothing funny about it in real life. No one likes to be belittled and told…

It sure seems like anger is the emotion of the day. People are angry about masks, injustice, work demands, elections, relationship issues, and more. And that anger is stoked by social media and media. Anger and outrage are the top  news stories of the day. It seems there is much to be outraged about. While…

It happens to all of us. Someone treats us unfairly. It hurts. We don’t like it and want to retaliate.  But how we respond to unfair treatment matters. It reveals our heart. And we may not like what we see. Thanks to a recent event, I got to test myself in this area once again.…

Jack and Jenna came to couple therapy to get help for their very unhappy relationship.The problem was, they didn’t really want the help. They wanted me to validate their decision to break up. It took only a few minutes to see their dysfunctional patterns of interaction. The path to their unhappiness was predictable. In my…

True confession. I am a coffee lover. Ever since my college days, I learned to love coffee. I was too poor to afford cream or sugar in those days so I drank it black. Looking back, I had terrible coffee habits when studying for exams. Some nights I would drink up to 10 cups cramming…

Two moms are at the park watching their preschoolers play. One child hands a toy truck to his friend and says, “Here, you can play with it.” The other hangs on to his toy car for dear life. When his friend asks to share it, he stubbornly says, “No! It’s mine!” and jerks his hands…

It was time for my routine mammogram. The center’s waiting area was not where I expected to read about how porn could help me! But a magazine was placed (interestingly) next to a Bible on a small table. Curious by the cover story, I picked up the magazine and began flipping through the pages. I…

Ann and Jennifer both lost their jobs during the pandemic. But their reactions to this stress were very different. Jennifer went into a downward spiral of anxiety and depression. Ann remained hopeful and optimistic. Two people had similar experiences, but  such different reactions. Why is that? The answer involves a number of factors: The perception…

A friend asked an interesting question. “Can I love someone into changing?” She is married to a man who has many issues, and she’s finding it is harder and harder to live with him.  She wonders why her love hasn’t been enough to inspire him to change. Doesn’t love conquer all? Forget all the romantic movies…

Have you ever have brain fog? We heard about it during COVID. Brain fog is not a medical term. It involves your thinking and memory. You feel a little slow, forget words and feel like you are in a memory fog. When brain fog is stress-induced, your memory isn’t really the problem. It’s more about…
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