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Doing Life Together

Rick and Sue announced their marital separation. As we talked, I asked, “Have you ever been to a couple’s therapist to try and work out your problems?” Their answer, “Yes, we tried, it didn’t work.” “Can you give me a few details?” “Well we went one time when we decided to separate. The therapist wanted to see us individually but…

Mothers all over the country will be receiving flowers, candy and going out to dinner. There will be special celebrations and lots of different feelings about the mothers being honored. For some, it will be a difficult day as they struggle to find ways to honor a problematic relationship.  Others will joyfully celebrate the special mother-child…

People struggling in a marriage either wait too long to get relationship help or refuse help. Yet, we know how to help marriages headed to divorce. But there are 3 preconditions necessary to do the hard work of resurrecting a dying marriage or bringing problems to the forefront to be helped. Here are those preconditions: 1) Consider…

Is your life a great adventure or are you just trying to survive the day? Be honest. When it comes to everyday living, most of us would opt for more adventure and less boredom. We waste too much time fretting about things we can’t control and being distracted by the unimportant. The result is a…

Sitting with women friends at coffee one day, the conversation turned to the topic of mothers and daughters. There we sat, discussing how to feel like grown ups around our moms. Visits home often left these women feeling like they were ten-years-old again. At one point, they all turned to me and said, “Ok start…

So many parents feel tremendous pain at having children who leave their Christian faith and do not go to church. According to studies by both Barna Group and USA Today, the staggering numbers are almost 75% of Christian young people. The reasons for this defection are many–competing cultural voices, biblical illiteracy, poor parent role models, hypocrisy…

About a month ago, I visited the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum in DC. The experience was sobering, frightening, and chilling. This was clearly one of history’s darkest chapters. At the end of the tour, I was struck by one of the survivors who spoke on video. In tears, highly impassioned, he cried out, “God where were…

Stress affects people differently. Some people carry stress in their physical bodies. Others are more stressed because of their thoughts. They worry and become anxious. When stress originates from your thoughts, you need cognitive strategies to help you relax. The Bible even directs us to do so, “… whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever…

Sally looked down and a bit anxious. “I don’t know what is wrong with me. I’m just not that interested in sex with my husband these days. I feel exhausted with three small kids, I’m working part-time and have been on an antidepressant. Any thoughts?” One of the top sexual concerns for women has to…

My husband and I are separating and we have two grade-school age children, grades one and three. How do we tell them what is going to happen? Both of us agree we should probably do it together but don’t know what to say. I am sorry to hear that you are separating and hope you…
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