Even though there’s been so much coverage of Michael Jackson’s tragic and early death, I am still interested in him.  I always loved his music and entertainment, and probably always will, yet there will be nothing more from him now, so sadly.  I also related to his life: childhood traumas under the hand of a tyrant father, medical problems and lots of doctors, and his often proclaimed feeling of loneliness and obvious expressions of poor self-image.  He even had a problem with weight, he was seen as anorexic.

His memorial service yesterday was pretty amazing.  So many celebrities and many fans; billions the whole world over.  Michael would have probably loved all the attention and stardom; fame beyond limits. Yet, Michael was separated from it.  There he was, present, but dead in a lonely (gold) coffin.  Michael Jackson, alone in death, as he was alone in life.

In his autobiography, he talked about being an international star, but very lonely and trapped in a world of such restrictive fame.  We hear from his doctor, Arnold Klein, and biographer, Martin Basheer, that he was in constant pain.  He had lupus, a horrible disease that causes your own bodily immune system to painfully attack itself from the inside out.  He felt very inferior and evidently unsatisfied with his looks, ever attempting to alter his face and persona in a never-ending quest for “perfection.”

The pain of one day being the most famous person in the world, with the greatest-selling music of all-time, to the next of being laughed at for being a “freak,” endlessly scrutinized for “weirdness” and accusations of molesting children, the failed marriages, the children wearing disguises, his mounting debts and loss of his fantastic dream-ranch and now the drug addiction that purportedly killed him – it just added up to be to much for one man to take.

His fame killed him.  His desire for a normal life and family mixed with his insatiable desire to be the greatest entertainer ever imploded him from the inside-out.  No amount of money, fame and external attention could satisfy.  No amount of pain-killers, surgeries or doctors could quench the interior pain of loneliness and self-loathing.

What’s missing in all the coverage?  There has been little mention at all of Michael Jackson’s faith in God.  We hear occasionally that he was “spiritual,” and that he was  a Jehovah’s Witness as are many family members, but not much has been said about his relationship with God.

I learn an important lesson from Michael Jackson:  appreciate myself exactly the way I am, the way that God made me and wants me to be.  Appreciate the joy and satisfaction of ordinary living, as well as the pain and struggle that is sometimes necessary in order to live life, and experience life to the fullest.  Do my best and reach for the stars praying for God’s mercy and direction, but at the same time, be at peace and feel the love and blessings that God provides me in every way: great or modest.

Most of all, I don’t seek fame or fortune above all, but seek the love of God and the love within myself and my family, friends and fellow-humans.  I don’t look to stardom for comfort, or money or pills for happiness.  I pray to God for guidance and His love.

What have YOU learned from Michael Jackson?  We’d all love to know, so please comment.

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