I had lunch the other day with my dear friend, and colleague, Dr. Harville Hendrix, author (with his wife Helen LaKelly Hunt) of “Getting the Love You Want.”  That’s a classic bestselling book that “can save your marriage,” according to Oprah.

Dr. Hendrix and I were talking about anxiety, and why people have it.  He finds that anxiety is a lot about fears – particularly about fear of something negative, destructive, failure, or death.  I added from my studies into anxieties, that, like Sigmund Freud said, they can take two forms:  fears about something real, or things that are imagined.

We both agreed, and quickly got to the point about what to do about anxiety:  change the “narrative” in your head.  Whenever you find yourself thinking about a fear (like how you are doomed, or things going bad, or negative images of yourself, or fear of death, even), give yourself a positive narrative.

“I’m going to be OK.”  “People will appreciate me.”  “I’ve done this before, and things have been fine, because I am fine.”

Also, Dr. Hendrix added that it’s a great idea to have a mental picture of the narrative.  “Think about what good will happen, and also see an image of it,” he suggested.  That means, not only telling yourself that you are OK, but seeing yourself in OK, successful, safe situations.

I think this is great advice.  Something to not only remind yourself to do on a regular basis, but to take deep breaths along with it, see yourself and tell yourself that all is well, and is going to be OK.

“I’m going to eat less, and in healthy ways.  I see myself as full with only half of what I might ordinarily eat.”  Try that today.

Please share YOUR positive narratives and mental pictures with us by commenting below.