Published by The Daily Star in Oneonta, NY

November is National Adoption Month

By Cheryl Petersen

The 40th anniversary of National Adoption Month highlights the power to adopt new ideas; to celebrate adults and children alike, who adopt new thoughts, new dreams and new positions to bring stability to homes and communities.

In 1986, the initiative to increase awareness for the need of permanent families for children and youth in the foster care system, was put into effect in Massachusetts.

The program soon expanded to include the entire United States. November was deemed National Adoption Month. And with the advent of the internet came a national photo listing service. Those looking to adopt can find children and youth available for adoption, continuously posted online.

Aside from the mechanics of adoption, however, comes the essence of fostering and adoption. It can be a sensitive, complex, and confusing process.

From East Branch, Nikolas Bowker,18, said, “When I first entered a foster home, I was confused. I didn’t know what to do with myself.”

Today, Bowker is unafraid to tell other children in state care, “It gets better.”

The “better” came about with the help of many people. It came about through efforts made to overcome snags and slip-ups.

Bowker admitted to acting out at first, and said, “I got into fights in school. I felt as though I was being treated differently from other kids who had parents.” But he and his sister, Briana, went on to be fostered by the Bowker family, who later adopted the siblings on Nikolas’ birthday.

Today, Bowker is finishing high school, with a goal to continue caring for his own family.

He said he appreciates the support he has received from family members, teachers, coaches and others. “It’s nice having a family that cares for us,” he said.

Briana Bowker, 13, is homeschooled and uses an online program managed by Liberty University Academy.

“Each Friday, I get to meet with other homeschoolers my age and from around the area. We play games,” said Briana, who also takes piano lessons.

Briana says she enjoys having a big family. She remarked, “I never thought I’d have so many brothers and sisters.”

Their parents are Jennifer and Health Bowker, also parents to 11-year-old Heath, 10-year-old Caeden, 8-year-old Wyatt, 6-year old Tessa, and “We adopted 2-year-old Finnegan last year,” said Jennifer.

Jennifer and Heath said they felt “blessed” to have four biological children and wanted to do something for children who didn’t start with a loving family. They live on a small farm and give the children morning and evening chores to teach them self-worth and responsibility.

“It’s God’s overwhelming love poured on us that compels us to share that love,” said Jennifer.

Jennifer summed her thoughts with a quote from the Gospel of Matthew: “Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.”

The Bowker family worked closely with the Delaware County Department of Social Services, which is in charge of public foster care and adoptions.

Concurrent plans are established within the department to reach the goals of keeping children in a safe environment and returning the children to birth family members; and if that doesn’t work, freeing the children, legally and emotionally, to be adopted.

“The Social Services Department takes great pains to match children and families,” said Rebecca Hoyt, director of services.

Working with the department since 1999, Hoyt said she has seen trends come and go, but one thing stays the same. “We try to get families back on track and keep the children in homes with a sense of normalcy,” she said.

To deal with the growing drug epidemic, the county instituted a Family Treatment Court to deal with cases through the Department of Social Services.

Hoyt works with many case workers along with Commissioner Dana Scuderi-Hunter. Training programs are in place for case workers and parents.

The top reasons children are placed in state care are parental substance dependence, child neglect, and domestic violence. Knowing this, the department provides prevention services for families and children.

Scuderi-Hunter said, “It’s about making the children feel welcomed and integrating them into families and the community. We don’t try to erase their past, but work with who they are and where they are from to move on in a life of normalcy.”

Awareness and education are also used to remove the stigma that comes with being a foster child. “When we all embrace a healthy image of the children, they gain confidence,” Scuderi-Hunter said.

The department also assists foster children with higher education.

Scuderi-Hunter said she has also noticed that confidence allows the children to feel more secure to return to care after they turn 18 years old. “It’s the youth’s personal choice until they are 21 years old,” she said.

With the active synergy of state regulations, trainings, preventive services, treatment programs and education, the number of foster children has been decreasing in Delaware County.

“Many factors are involved, but in 2015 there were 97 children in foster care. As of September 2016, there were 68,” Scuderi-Hunter said.

Data also shows that 15 adoptions were recorded in 2014. The number increased to 17 in 2015. “This year to date, 15 children have been adopted with an anticipation of four more,” said Scuderi-Hunter.

To make adoption a special event for the children and families, Adoption Days are scheduled throughout the year. Scuderi-Hunter said, “I love going to adoption days. I love seeing the permanency. Because, when we make a positive difference in the life of all children, it affects the future.”

http://www.thedailystar.com/news/lifestyles/november-is-adoption-month/article_5625d233-ace3-57ec-9c48-729ed1d9d565.html