Divorces come in all shapes and sizes.

But threads of the same universal truths exist in most of them.

The loss, the devastation, the inexplicable shame, the uncertainty, the worry, the stress, the isolation, and the pain.

In short, an emotional mouth full. 

And worse, for some misplaced notion of failure many can never fully digest it.

Divorce, however, is not a failure it is simply the tragic end of something which was once truly beautiful.

And the awakening of the new path you were ultimately meant to take in life.

Which initially resembles a jungle.

Until you whittle away at the jolting fear, sadness, and pain.

And the path becomes less cluttered and emotional visibility improves.

20 Things I Know About Divorce:

1. The absurdity of shame. Divorce is a 50 Billion dollar industry. You are not alone though it might feel like it.
2. The loss of an entire life built is staggering. To understand you would have to experience it.
3. The personal and emotional losses are exponential. You lose far more than a spouse.
4. Any friend lost is, actually a gain. A person who walked away at your worst never had the ability to love you at your best.
5. You need the right counselor. A good counselor teaches self-accountability and healing, not hatred.
6. Abuse in the divorce process needs to be exposed and awareness incredibly heightened.
7. Divorce is a highly misunderstood and complex life event.
8. The emphasis is mistakenly put on the spouses when it should be put on the children.
9. It is loss and a distinct grief accompanies it.
10. It is both emotionally universal and emotionally distinct. No one size fits all.
11. It mimics a fall from grace.
12. It can momentarily destroy even the highest self-esteem.
13. It eventually and ultimately reinforces and reinvigorates that same self-esteem.
14. It confuses you, strengthens you, and alters you.
15. It brings you closer to yourself and eventually restores lost individuality.
16. It is an emotionally naked and uncomfortable journey amongst society.
17. It is filled with judgment even though it is a path many do not willingly choose but are forced into.
18. Regardless of supposed societal evolution divorce is still a negative label.
19. It is your worst nightmare realized and ultimately you wake to a brand new dream.
20. It brings you closer to God.

And there you have it.

20 things I actually wish I didn’t know about divorce but I do.

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