Long before my divorce, I first had to face the demise of my marriage. I have a great girlfriend who fortunately was there at the time to set me straight. In true victim fashion, I bemoaned my loss. Why me? Why my marriage? Why my husband? Why my children? Why my family? Why?! Why?! Why?!…

In the beginning of my divorce, I remember having lunch with two of my girlfriends.  “Why does this always happen to the kindest women?” One asked while the other agreed. “It’s not kindness,” I replied. “There are plenty of kind women who are happily married. It is kindness with zero boundaries and a lack of…

One day my marriage counselor said, “Colleen, you have the ability to see your own faults and this is unusual. The average person, not even a difficult personality, does not necessarily have the ability to see their own faults.” I realized why he was telling me this. I couldn’t reach my husband no matter how…

It’s hard to admit shortcomings in any aspect of our lives. It’s even more challenging to face the fault in our relationships. It signifies the frightening possibility of surrendering to the potential demise of the complex relationships that sustain us when they do not drain us. There are a variety of ways to kick a…

I hate change. I am a creature of comfort. I love my family, the town I grew up in and I had zero desire to venture off to college. My mom had other plans. For me, that is. A spitfire of a New Yorker, she told me not only would I be going to college…

Couples usually go to marriage counseling with the belief that their better half is the true reason they have ended up in counseling. In truth, it takes two people to arrive at this destination. Some relationships experience a slow and neglectful erosion and therefore, it makes sense both individuals must take responsibility. The time and…

The real problem with most relationships? They revolve around difficult personalities rather than LOVE. It’s a complete contradiction. Yet, we tolerate it as an acceptable norm. We need to elevate the hypocrisy. A tremendous number of relationships don’t end because of a lack of love, they end because an ego (I mean a person –…

I am a bit nervous this morning. I am on the way to meet a friend. We have a few too many, obvious parallels and instead of feeling this is helpful, it makes me sad. I never, ever, want to see a heart hurt again. Let alone one that would never have the ability to…

Okay, maybe I am watching too many Hallmark Channel and Lifetime movies, but I’m starting to wish that something magical will happen this Christmas season. The kind of fairy tale where you meet a stranger and they make a huge impact in your life or… The long, complicated holiday journey home met with unexpected obstacles…

I am catching up on some reading. I flip through the pages of a months old Elle Magazine and happen upon an article. A quote jumps out from the pages. “There are two main reasons people cry: Being separated from an intimate relationship or feeling powerless.” – Elle Magazine I can only agree heartily with…

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