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Matters of the heart are messy, right? It’s impossible to move on from most relationships, right? The answer to both of these questions would be yes. Yet, we are the ones who often get in our own way. We rationalize why we stay in unhealthy relationships.  And because of this fact, we remain in them…

People stop hurting you when you finally accept and acknowledge who they are. My father didn’t have the power to hurt me once I understood and accepted he suffered from alcoholism. This never impacted my love for him. He was my dad and that would never change yet nor would my sadness or disappointment in…

Love is confusing. Logic might say it’s because it involves not just matters of the heart but two different people. And that would be true. But what makes it even more baffling is somehow we mistakenly think we can do the work of two people. This bears repeating…we believe we can do the work of…

As the saying goes…breaking up is hard to do. It’s difficult to describe the excruciating pain of separating one heart from another. But is it possible we can actually make it harder on ourselves? At the very least, it is possible we may extend the heartache longer than necessary. By limping along and rejecting rather…

It takes guts to go to counseling. Hence, there should be no stigma attached to it. Too many people suffer in silence while many of the world’s aches and pains are universal. There is no shame in seeking relief and respite from the worries of the world. Personal accountability and growth is something to be…

Apologizing can be difficult. Yet, it is one of the most important relationships skills we can master. Why? Because the people we love are more important than being right. Or at least they should be. The problem with the majority of apologies? They are too complex and lack sincerity and simplicity. The complexity derives from…

My youngest son and I were enjoying a meal out when he said, “You seem less stressed.” “Really?” I say back. I can see the bewilderment in his face. After all, I have the same problems. The divorce may be finalized but the remnants will linger for some time. I still have zero retirement, bad…

Many of us remain in broken relationships far longer than we should. Change is difficult. And a large number of us lack the self-protective boundaries which would get us out sooner.  Instead, we concentrate on the actual ‘no longer working’ relationship more than we do on ourselves. Which ultimately, further complicates things. Partnerships which in…

Love is the magic elixir. In fact, love is so intoxicating it can temporarily make us lose our perspective.  Yet, there is one thing we should never, ever lose sight of. We deserve to not just be loved.  We deserve to be loved well.  The question begs, what does it take to ensure we are…

In relationships, we often ‘neglect to reflect’ on how a person makes us feel. Instead, we try and get their attention by explaining what hurts or bothers us.  Or we simply sit quietly and compensate or overcompensate to deal with unwanted behaviors. In all relationships be it romantic or friendship the best litmus test is to…
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