I just returned this morning from Milwaukee.
Jessica‘s sister, Melissa, was married this weekend. My sister-in-law’s wedding went beautifully.
Elias ran down the aisle when he was supposed to…
And then three minutes later, he ran right back up the aisle…
Melissa looked absolutely beautiful.
Dan, Melissa’s husband, handled the day with humor and grace.
And Jessica, the matron of honor, looked gorgeous.
And me? Well, I sang, and for the most part, hit all of my notes. And at least twelve people asked me why I didn’t have a record deal… I even got an offer from one of Jessica’s relatives to start a band.
Since getting married nearly six years ago, anytime I attend a wedding, I always end up thinking about Jessica and my wedding day. It was a perfect day. Jessica looked like she should have been on the cover of a wedding magazine. I was fat on Zoloft back then, but still, cleaned up nicely. Our wedding service was uniquely “us,” a sometimes sickening mixture of classic, popular, and sappy. But “us.”
And then the reception… food, dancing, champagne, kind words, and of course, a table of scrapbooks detailing the history of Jessica and my relationship… and again, all of that was perfect and good and meant so much…
Then, at some point during the reception, it hit me…. I remembered something that Jessica had said in the weeks leading up to that day. She and I had been arguing–not really arguing–discussing the finances of our wedding.
I said something like, “You don’t think it’s going to be pretentious, do you? I don’t want it to be pretentious.”
And then she said, “No. Not at all. Because I don’t think our wedding day is about ‘us’ as much as it is a ‘celebration’ of all the people who make us ‘us’.”
And THAT’S what our special day was for Jessica and me… a celebration of the most important people in our lives.
As I took a moment to take in the scene of our reception, I looked around that room and realized that nearly every person that Jessica and I loved in that moment was in that room…
The people–friends and family–we cared about.
The people who had raised us.
Shaped us.
Moved us.
Cried with us.
Prayed for us.
Taught us something true.
The people we needed (and still need)…
They were there. (Most of them anyway… )
And THAT overwhelmed me. Because how often does that happen? A gathering of the most important people in one’s life? In one room. Happy. Smelling good. Dancing…
That was a powerful moment for me. A moment that I consider and relive and value every time I go to a wedding.
(And then there’s that first picture of Elias-above with Buzz Lightyear-that’s pretty darn amazing, too…)
As odd as this might seem… weddings are good reminders for me… that it’s not all about ‘us.’