You’ve probably heard this song (“Love the Way You Lie”) by Eminem (with Rihanna).

Warning: The above version is the unedited version, so keep that in mind if there are children around.

I’m not a big fan of rap music. Unless it’s being played on Top-Forty, I probably have never heard it. But for some reason, whenever Eminem releases new music, I have to listen. Even if it’s just once. Of course, “Love the Way You Lie” is being played twice an hour on some stations, so it’s difficult not listening. Still, even if it wasn’t playing on every pop station 100 times a day, I’d listen…

…because I relate to it.

The narrative in the song reflects pretty extreme (I’m assuming they’re extreme) circumstances of an abusive relationship. Now, I’ve never felt the need to burn a house down. And in my entire life, I’ve only hit somebody once (in the 8th grade… on the school bus… after one of my classmates spit on a girl–I punched him… and then he punched me. And he punched me again. Pushed me onto the dirty bus floor and punched me again… and then one more time…), but still, I can relate to some of the passion and anger and frustration and expectations and emotion in this song’s lyric…

I can’t tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there’s a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can’t breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It’s like I’m in flight
High off a love
Drunk from the hate…

…Wait
Where you going
I’m leaving you
No you ain’t
Come back
We’re running right back
Here we go again
It’s so insane
Cause when it’s going good
It’s going great
I’m Superman
With the wind in his bag
She’s Lois Lane

Can you relate? At all? Maybe not your current relationship, but a past one?

You swore you’ve never hit ’em
Never do nothing to hurt ’em
Now you’re in each other’s face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit ’em
You push
Pull each other’s hair
Scratch, claw, bit ’em
Throw ’em down…

I’ve spewed venom before…

Not proud of it. But I have. And then afterward, when the emotion behind the words is gone (or hidden), I end up feeling a little like this…some crazy/pathetic/human mixture of guilt, apology, blame, dependence, and “reason”…

…Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn’t mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper’s just as bad
As mine is
You’re the same as me
But when it comes to love
You’re just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn’t you
Baby it was me

And then comes my favorite line in the song…

…Maybe that’s what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though…

And then perhaps the most truthful part of the lyric… maybe not in the actual circumstances… but the emotion…. the anger… the war between good/bad happening inside your (my) head….

…Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it’s lies
I’m tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I’m a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I’mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire…

Yes, the narrative presents an extreme situation… but still, there’s a lot of truth in those words… we don’t like to admit these kinds of truths most of the time. Usually, these truths, whether literal (you’ve burned down your lover’s house) OR physical or emotional or verbal or fill-in-your-own-blank get kept inside the walls of our houses or condos or dorm rooms or… because we’re embarrassed about these things…

I think I relate to this song because it displays a raw kind of humanity… the kind of humanity that any one of us is capable of becoming (or revealing…) put in the right (wrong…) circumstances.

This song also presents the sort of truth (anger… violence… physical abuse… verbal abuse… emotional abuse…) that sometimes (not always…) gets ignored inside the walls of churches.

Sometimes that’s because it’s happening inside the walls of the church… again, not necessarily the physical part… but the emotional part and the verbal part…

…which is why I pose the question… can we handle Eminem’s (our?) truth?

Cuz sometimes truth ain’t pretty, which might be why we Christians use asterisks…