Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for Thumbnail image for * LOA logo2.jpgToday is Day 18 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jumpstarting your own self-love.

This is post 122 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how.

People complain to me about all the things going wrong in their lives. They blame what people say, circumstances, and other obstacles for not getting what they want and ask how long will it take to turn things around. When will they manifest what they want? They don’t like my response at first. People who want to tap into their spiritual power often think there are magical answers for using the Law of Attraction for their benefit. I tell them to go to the mirror to see the reason for a lack of manifesting.

YOU create your reality! When your spiritual intentions aren’t working, something in you is RESISTING having what you say you want.

I’ve said this to people who looked at me like I have 2 heads and then got indignant that I said their thoughts were keeping them from getting what they say they want. They tell me how badly they want it and don’t understand why they don’t attract their desires. But in most cases, if you’re trying to manifest what you want and coming up empty, it’s because you have resistance to getting it. According to the Law of Attraction, no one else is to blame for your lack of manifesting.   

Resistance is a key factor in not manifesting yet often we don’t recognize it. Understanding resistance is a hard concept for many people to accept, since it’s all on you. Focusing on any negative as you think about what you want is resistance. Resistance can come in the form of underlying emotions: fear, doubts, memories of past failures, etc. You very well may not even be aware that you have these feelings if they’re subtle or subconscious.

A great act of self-love is looking within to determine what you do that creates resistance and breaking it down so it doesn’t hold you back from getting what you want–a gift of self-love!

I’ve talked about how you have to be a vibrational match in several of my LOA posts. Emotions explains how the feelings we have create the vibration that attracts positive or negative results. You may have heard it said that if you’re not a vibrational match for what you want, you won’t attract it. Vibrations are kind of like the magnetism that allow magnets to attract things or repel them. If you want to get more money, get sincerely excited about money coming, keep it up throughout the day whenever possible, and live as though you already have it. What happens? An unexpected check arrives or you get a promotion at work or someone leave you an inheritance, etc.

You become a magnet for money by having positive expectations that you actually have strong emotions about.

I’ve had magnets attract something on my table or from somewhere that I didn’t expect because the object had the same magnetic force, just as I’ve gotten what I wanted from unexpected sources. But if you try to put the ends of 2 magnets together, they repel each other, just as negative emotions repel the thing you say you want. That’s resistance. YOU create it. YOU can dispel it. Instead of accepting this truth and doing something about it, people defend themselves–reinforcing resistance! They don’t understand how what they say they want isn’t as strong as how they feel about it:
?
•    “I’m dying to a healthy romantic partner!” You may be dying to have one BUT– if deep down you don’t feel worthy of one or old messages are subconsciously playing in your head or you continue to be attracted to people who don’t treat you well based solely on their appearance or power or it feels more comfortable to be with someone who has the qualities you’re used to, even if it’s drinking too much or being critical–you have resistance to being with a person who will make you happy. Building self-love can break those beliefs down.

•    “I want to have a lot more money and keep putting that out till I feel crazy but still feel poor.” You may want a lot money but–if you still feel poor you will keep feeling poor. Thoughts of what you don’t want is resistance. Working like crazy is resistance. Any negative feelings are resistance. Worrying about paying bills is resistance. Fear of not cutting it in a job that pays more is resistance. Writing down what you’ll do with the money and planning for it, with anticipation, can lower resistance. Shout, “I’m so grateful for being financially solvent.

•    “I keep saying I want my health condition to go away. I don’t want to hurt anymore and want to have energy. Why doesn’t the Universe hear me?” Frustration is resistance. So is focusing on the ailment, which doesn’t make you feel good. When you feel bad, express gratitude for your healing as if you have it. That keeps you focused on feeling good. Why focus on how lousy you feel? Look beyond to feeling better!

•    “I’m dying to get a job in another city but it never works out.” Are you nervous about the relocating part? Worried about making new friends? On one hand you do want to move to the city you’ve dreamed of living in. On the other, all the what ifs play in the back of your head, creating the resistance that keeps you stuck where you are. Pre-plan. Look online at jobs and apartments. Let that get you excited so you’re thinking about how great it will be when you’ve gotten settled instead of all the scary things you’ll have to deal with.

The above statements are examples of people who say they’re trying to manifest but their emotions create resistance to making it happen. Intellectually you may want something but if your emotions and beliefs don’t support your intentions, you have resistance and will continue to be wanting. The more negative emotions you feel, the more resistance you have to allowing what you say you want. When you think about what you want, try to tune in to your underlying feelings. Be honest. What scares you? When you can deal with the fears, manifesting gets easier.

The ramifications of significant changes or big desires can feel overwhelming, even if you’re getting good stuff.

You need a plan for managing your extra money or to buy new clothes if you lose a lot of weight or to make time to spend with a romantic partner or all the other things that go along with a life move. Getting what you want isn’t as simple as it sounds. Write down what will happen when you get it. What will you have to take
care of then? What groundwork can you do now? All of this builds the positive emotions that ALLOW good manifesting to happen. They send a message that you’re ready for and expecting your intentions to manifest.

Resistance and allowing are like the ying and yang of manifesting. Negative emotions create and maintain resistance. Positive emotions can dissolve it and allow what you want to happen.

In Generating the Emotions to Manifest I give many tips on how to up your vibration, which can counter resistance. Can you actually feel what it would be like if what you want happened or are you worrying about what might happen if you actually get what you want? I was recently on a live radio show where people called in. A woman called, saying how desperately she wanted to get taken seriously yet people walked all over her at work. She woefully said she figured it would also happen if she was in a relationship. Her resistance to getting respect was in every word she said, yet she couldn’t see it.

It can be hard to recognize resistance in yourself, which is why it’s so important to play detective if necessary and look for yours.

I was writing books for years and couldn’t get published. When I finally got an agent, she couldn’t sell my first book. It finally hit me that I was afraid I’d change if I wrote books that did well. Once I identified that fear I decided that I’d be okay and it was time to get published, I shouted that all weekend long when I was alone, especially riding in my car. I got myself worked up emotionally about getting published. On Monday I had my first deal. Buh bye resistance!

Pay attention to what might be holding you back by creating resistance. The more you can identify your resistance, the better chance of lowering it. Tomorrow I’ll have part 2 about lowering resistance, including one of the most loving, powerful tools for lowering resistance that I’ve encountered. Stay tuned!

Take the self-love challenge and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at http://howdoiloveme.com. And you can post your loving acts HERE to reinforce your intention to love yourself.

See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series HERE.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.

More from Beliefnet and our partners