The first step in harmonious relationships is simple: We need only realize the spiritual truth that we cannot meet someone whom we are not like in some way, even if we don’t actively express what we don’t like seeing in him or her. The deception is that we’re sure we’re unlike everyone except for those who match the images we have of ourselves. And so it goes that we live from — see our lives through the eyes of a certain false sense of “I” that always resists anyone seen as being “not like I am.” But love cannot grow where resistance rules.

We have not been given this precious life in order to go through it resisting everything that doesn’t suit us; rather we are created to grow through whatever we meet along the way. Resistance devitalizes the possibility of our spiritual development, rendering useless the conditions in our lives that we are given in order to rise above them. When we resist what others show us about ourselves, we close the door on the possibility of transcending the undiscovered parts of us that are troubled by them. Freedom is not found by avoiding what disturbs us, but by illuminating — realizing and releasing — whatever may dwell in the dark of us that can be disturbed… [to be continued]