When the doctor taps your knee and it suddenly jerks, you don’t get upset with your leg for jumping out of control. Why? Because in that moment, you realize your temporary jumpy experience is an involuntary physical reaction.

But, how do you view your emotional reactions when they start jerking you around? Not only are they hard on you, but once they’re done, you’re then hard on yourself with a negative reaction to your first reaction. Here’s how to release and relax yourself from these runaway self-wrecking reactions.

To begin with, understand that you are not your own reactions, anymore than the burst of a flashing skyrocket is the night sky it temporarily illuminates. And yet, it really does feel that way. Let’s find out why.

Painful reactions to life events are just mechanical, emotional knee jerks. They only become more than a package from the past when you say “I” to the first reaction. This misplaced identification may feel like you, but it’s not. And now you can learn this rescuing fact for yourself.

Each time you feel a reaction about to take you over, just relax from yourself. Let that reaction be there, within you, without your involvement. Don’t say “I” to it.

This conscious new action releases the reaction to complete its life, instead of stealing yours. It soon fades and you’re free. So, relax. And release yourself.