Picture this scenario…

You meet a girl, you hit it off big-time and end up going back to hers. You sleep together. Next morning you chat for a bit and then leave. Three days later she sends you a text, something like, “Hi, the other night was fun…”

Everything seems hunky-dory right?

WRONG!

What seems like a friendly and easy-going text from her was really the result of three days of
heartache and worry. She was most likely feeling depressed and rejected after you two hooked up.

But you didn’t know. Your initial success is now crashing and burning quicker than a flaming Hindenberg, but how could you possibly have known what she was going through? It’s not your fault, right?

WRONG again!

In order to remain in control of a situation like this, it is crucial to be aware of the emotional factors in play.

In other words, you need to understand *how the girl feels* at any given moment. Not just in this situation, but in any situation you may find yourself in involving you and a female of the species.

This is a skill, and it has a name. It is called ‘empathy’.

Empathy is the skill of being able to understand how the other person is feeling in a situation. To know what they are going through, their emotional state.

It’s really easy to overlook empathy as a useful skill. It’s often an example of ‘you don’t know what you don’t know’.

Don’t let this fool you though. The difference between a keen sense of empathy and little empathy is often the difference between success and failure.

Why empathy matters

If you are able to know how a girl is feeling at any given moment (or at lest have a pretty good idea), then you will be able to handle any situation that may arise that involves the two of you.

For example, in our scenario earlier, if you had realised that the girl would feel rejected by you not texting the next day, you would have known to send a text, and thus avoid any of the ensuing drama.

How to have more empathy

Having more empathy is more a change in mentality, than something you have to learn how to do.

All you need to do is imagine yourself in their situation. Think, ‘If I was this person, how would I feel?’

This subtle shift is all it takes to have more empathy.

Give it a try next time you are interacting with a girl. Ask yourself how you think she is feeling. You can try this on female friends, work colleagues, or even family members. Imagine how they feel, and then ask them. Talk to them about their feelings. See if you got it right or not.

After a few weeks of doing this, you will develop a feel for things. Almost like a ’sixth sense’, you will have successfully ‘calibrated’ as they say. And you will be well on your way to a deeper understanding of the female brain.