In this article, I’m going to shed some light on how to get your girlfriend back. If you are going through a break up, I feel your pain. Heartache is one of the most painful experiences anyone can go through and I know first hand how bad it sucks. It leaves you feeling insecure, unsure of yourself and desperate for her to take you back.

Ironically, acting in this manner is the best way to send her running towards towards the hills. Instead of being the cool, confident guy your girlfriend went crazy over, suddenly you’ve become a desperate weirdo whose called her 14 times in the last 2 days.

Whatever your situation may be, this article can help bring you one step closer towards getting your ex back. I’m going to tell you exactly how to get your girlfriend back. I’ll examine why she broke up with you in the first place, what 95% of guys do to make things even worse and what you can do to finally have her back in your arms.

Why Your Girlfriend Initially Fell For You

Before we delve into why your girlfriend broke up with you, we need to examine the concept of attraction and more specifically, the real reason she fell for you in the first place. One of the main ideas you need to understand is that women are primarily attracted to personality traits, while men are primarily attracted to physical traits.

A guy can be butt ugly and dirt poor, but if he has killer confidence and a well-developed personality, he’ll see a whole lot off success with women. On the flip-side, a woman can have the best personality in the world, but she’s not going to have many men asking for her number.

When your girlfriend first fell for you, there was something about your personality that she was initially attracted to. Maybe it was because you were a fun guy and always seemed to make her laugh. Maybe it was because you had rock-solid confidence and she was impressed by this. Maybe it was because you were laid back and she felt comfortable being around you. Whatever the reason may be, there was something about you she started to become drawn towards.

You liked her… She liked you… Then the two of you fell head over heels for each other. The birds were chirping, the sun was bright and love was in the air.  Yet as things wore on, things started to change. She started acting weird… She started acting distant and cold whenever you were around her. Then eventually BOOM, she leaves you ripping your heart out in the process. You’re lonely and confused wondering what the heck happened.

Why She Left You

What you need to understand is that during the relationship there may have been some change in your personality that fizzled out the attraction she once had for you. Remember how we said women are attracted to personality traits such as confidence? They can also be turned turned off by certain other personality traits such as neediness and wussiness…

Maybe during the relationship you started acting jealous whenever you’d see her talking with other guys. Maybe you started acting way too serious and weren’t fun to be around anymore. Maybe you became needy and wanted to be with her all the freakin’ time. These type of behaviors can KILL a woman’s feelings for a guy…

In most cases, these personality changes stem from a deep fear of losing her. It might have been a long and lonely road to find her and now that you are together, you’re terrified of her leaving you. Since you had this deep fear in the back of your mind, you started acting jealous, needy, insecure, wussy, etc. Basically, you started to become the exact opposite of who she was initially attracted to.

As a result, she started to become a bit distant. You could sense this. You could feel her attraction she felt for you slipping from your fingers until she finally left you. Now you’re alone, lonely and the only person that can take the pain away might be in bed with another guy. Ouch…

So what the heck do you need to do get your girlfriend back?

The one thing you need to understand is you can’t get your girlfriend back through logic. Most men think if they can convince their girlfriend why they should be together, their girlfriends will come running back. It doesn’t work this way. Women make decisions based off emotions and very rarely on logic. You may have the best argument in the world why she should take you back, but if those raw emotions inside her aren’t drawn towards you, it won’t matter. So don’t try and win her over by beating her in a debating contest.

Another thing you have to realize is begging and pleading for her to take you back will not work. If anything this type of wussy behavior will only confirm her decision in leaving you. Women want to be with strong men they can lean on. Leaving 4 voicemails in a row telling her you just want to go back to the days when she would call you her “snuffy-poo” won’t exactly show her how strong of a man you are.

In order to put yourself in the absolute best position to get your girlfriend back, you have to become the guy she initially fell in love with. You have to display the personality traits she initially loved about you. You have to be that fun, happy, care-free guy again.

But c’mon, let’s be honest with ourselves. You are not that guy right now. That guys is a distant memory compared to the person you’ve turned into. If anything, the loneliness and sadness of the break up has left you being the the type of guy she is completely repelled from.

So how the heck can you act all confident and happy when your heart has been shattered in a million tiny pieces? You know the phrase “fake it till you make it”? Well that will not work in your situation. A lot of guys call their ex-girlfriends up just to pretend how wonderful their life is now that they are broken up. This usually blows up in their faces. No matter how you are feeling inside, your ex will be able to sense this off of you. Women are very intuitive creatures and they can sense the subtlest of behavioral signals. If you feel sad and depressed, you can’t hide this from her. So rule #1 with getting your mojo back is you can’t fake it.

In order to get your girlfriend back and become the cool guy she once fell for, you actually have to… BE the cool guy she once fell for. Well what the heck does that mean?!?

It means stop wallowing in your sadness around the house. It means stop calling her a thousand times per day. It means stop obsessing over what you could have done to save the relationship. It means start showering, start working out and start getting your life back together. It means start living your life with or without her. It means start hanging out with your friends and having a good time again. Start laughing again. Start smiling again. Start living again.

You need to understand that bubble of happiness is wherever you go, and if your girlfriend decided to leave that bubble, that’s her own problem. The party is going to keep on rocking with or without her. Once you can truly come to this point in your life, I guarantee your ex will start to notice this and the chips will start falling in your favor. The attraction switches will start flipping up one by one until she’ll be wondering if you’ll ever call her back again.