Life fluctuates, there are good days, bad days, and in-between days. Some days a the feeling of invincibility comes over us, when it seems everything is going your ways. Other times the world decides it’s time to whoop our ass, as if we were a crook who ran away from the NYPD. This fluctuation is the natural progression of life, it’s balanced by the high’s a lows; the same reasons it’s cold in the winter and warm in the summer. It’s nature’s way of putting everything in balance.

When it comes to dating and relationship advice, this natural fluctuation is often ignored. Most of the dating advice for men are ways to meet women immediately and women are often given advice on how to immediately change their looks to immediately attract men. These tips make it seem as if we can walk out of the door at any given moment and have droves of potential dates at our feet without much of a hassle. This simply isn’t the case, dating is hot and cold.

We’re all human, we’re moody, upset, angry, ecstatic, happy, overjoyed all at different moments in our lives. I’m often reminded how the mood of an interested date has made them unavailable. There are periods of my life where I wouldn’t date because of my own personal and emotional struggles. I may be a good guy, but not so great when I’m upset or stressed. Even in relationships, I have my good and bad days; instead of fighting them I’ve found the benefit of recognizing it and working thru the emotions. Often when I’ve not worked thru my emotional struggles, I’ve often made a situation worse and would spend the evening at a bar, quietly drinking alcohol.

While mood is important, so is the mood of the other person. Maybe your potential date is stressed with work, handling major family issues, or unable to consider romantic encounters because of their emotional state. This is natural, we all go through tough times. If you are really interested in a person, you’ll consider an appropriate time to ask them for a date. This doesn’t mean you should wait for that person to become available, continue to enjoy your dating life by seeking other people and learn the most you can about your dating choices.

The ebbs and flows of dating is like mother nature, everyone has their warm season and their cold season. While, the Year Years, Spring, and the Fall seem like the best times to meet new people, my warm and cold season are different. The spring was the worst time to meet someone new, as I seemed to fair better in the summer and the fall. If you’ve fallen into a dry spell, consider your personal warm and cold seasons. This can help you determine when it’s a best time to try dating experiments (such as speed dating or new dating websites) or when to hold onto your preferred dating methods.