I recently heard two conflicting pieces of marriage advice. The first one said that every time you talk to your spouse on the phone, you finish by saying “I love you.” The second piece of advice said that this was the stupidest thing he’d ever heard.  Not coincidentally, the giver of the first piece of advice has been happily in his first marriage for decades now. The second giver has been married four times. You’re only as wise as the people you listen to.

In 2 Chronicles 10 the new king of Israel has a critical choice to make. The world-renowned king Solomon has just died and his son Rehoboam is about to ascend to the throne. At the coronation the people of Israel come to Rehoboam with a request: ease the burden of taxes and labor that your father Solomon has laid on us. Work with us, and we’ll be your loyal subjects. What to do? Is working with the people he’s called to lead being magnanimous or showing weakness? Rehoboam gets two conflicting pieces of advice. The first comes from his father’s advisors, who tell him to give a little at the beginning to win the support of the people. But Rehoboam goes in a different direction.

But Rehoboam rejected the advice the elders gave him and consulted the young men who had grown up with him and were serving him. He asked them, “What is your advice? 

The king answered [the people] harshly. Rejecting the advice of the elders, he followed the advice of the young men and said, “My father made your yoke heavy; I will make it even heavier. My father scourged you with whips; I will scourge you with scorpions.” 2 Chronicles 10:8-9, 13-14

Rehoboam chose to listen to his high school buddies and paid the price: his kingdom split into two and never united back together. Who are you choosing to listen to? Who is speaking into your life? Whose advice do you actually heed? Make sure you choose the right people, because you are only as wise as the people you choose to listen to.