Sagittariuses are always being accused of treating their love lives as if they were a sporting event, rather than like love lives. And why not? There’s anticipation, competition, and… more often than not… someone loses. So in that spirit, here’s the handy Sagittarius race card for who’s in the running, with odds of a win. No horse in this race is a guaranteed winner, but some bets are a lot safer than others. Then again, no guts, no glory…
Here are today’s odds on a winning relationship for you, Sagittarius:
Aries and Leo (3:2 odds): A fairly safe bet. Popular favorites, both these Fire signs have the sport you require. You may find Aries is awfully hard to steer into the chute, and Leo is sometimes more interested in being a show pony than a race winner.
Gemini (3:1 odds): Quick, responsive, and sporty… much like yourself. This is a pairing that often has people saying “oh gosh, you two are perfect for each other!” The problem is that despite the horseplay, deep down you have a thick, chewy philosophical center. You may never get past the sneaking suspicion that, with Gemini, it’s question marks all the way down…
Libra and Aquarius (4:1 odds): Both good bets, overall, with proven records of performance. Generally pleasant to get along with. Libra sometimes has a preference for standing there are just looking pretty when the bell rings. Aquarius is a bit of a rebel, and you like that… but sometimes it’s hard to figure out what they’re rebelling against. It may be you.
Virgo and Pisces (5:1 odds): Both unusual choices: the squares to one’s own sign aren’t where you usually look for a safe relationship bet. But both of these tend to outperform in long muddy stretches, compared to their reputations. Who knows why? You probably just love the challenge. Pisces is sometimes lacking the horse sense you require in a mate, and Virgo on a bad day? Nag, nag, nag…
Taurus (6:1 odds): A bull… not a horse. This can lend a lot of stability to a relationship… something Sagittarius usual forgets to bring to the table. Pleasant and generally kind… but if you were expecting to saddle up a Bull and get anywhere quickly… you’re in the wrong race, pal.
Cancer (8:1 odds): Jupiter rules Sagittarius, and is exalted in Cancer. Theoretically, this should make for great mutual joy and a solid philosophical relationship. The problem here is that crabs are designed to withstand accidental trampling… but they’re always waiting for it too. And you’ll provide it… probably by accident. So long, Crab.
Sagittarius (9:1 odds): SAG 1: I’m having a great time! SAG 2: Me too! Did you remember to bring the stability? SAG 1: No dude, I thought you had that covered. SAG 2: And, damn, we’re outta beer. SAG 1: It’s okay, I’ll go to the store and get more. SAG 2: You aren’t coming back, are you? SAG 1: Probably not. SAG 2: Okay. Later, dude…
Capricorn (10:1 odds): Obstinate, stubborn, and although they can have a fiery temperament, that fire doesn’t seem to be fuelling anything visible, a lot of the time. They can provide a valuable stabilizing, steering force in your life. Do you need that? Hell yeah! Do you like that? If your answer is “yes,” it’s time for the veterinarian to cut back on your tranquilizers.
Scorpio (15:1 odds): They have all the intensity and focus you lack. Of course, you never really asked for intensity and focus. or you did, and it just isn’t your style. They like sex though, and you do too. A sure winner… provided all the other horses break their legs first, and Scorpio doesn’t break yours.
Oh, and one more thing, Sagittarius? You’ve already got a bad enough reputation for running around on your relationships. Don’t go betting on the trifecta, okay?
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