Want to lose weight, but you don’t know where to start? Being honest with yourself about how you feel, what the number of the scale says and what it means to you is your first step toward emotional freedom and ultimately to winning the Battle of the Bulge.

I received the following email from a very brave and honest Kick in the Tush Club member. M.L. put her feelings about herself right out there and now the work begins!

Dear OLofWL ~

I am fatterthan I have ever been, and even though I intellectually get that things can only get worse from here, I lack the motivation to change. What stands in my way? At the end of the day, no matter how much weight I lose, no matter my dress size, I will still be ugly and undesirable. What’s the point? ~ M.L.

Dear M.L. ~

Thank you for putting your feelings right out there! You have created what I call a ‘double bind.’ You have positioned yourself in a place where, no matter what, you can’t win. If you lose weight, you still won’t get what you ultimately want. And if you stay ‘fat’ or get even heavier, you will feel just awful and suffer the consequences in terms of your health.

What to do? First congratulate yourself on taking your first step toward getting your ‘upward spiral’ in motion. You not only spoke your true feelings, you asked for help. Brava!

And now, let’s make ‘self-love’ the primary ingredient in your ‘diet’ plan. I’ve put together a quick 3-step ‘self-love’ program. Commit to these steps. Follow them religiously, every morning upon waking, for at least 30 days. You will be surprised to find how your experience of yourself will begin to shift.

1.  Fake it till you make it! Many of us suffer from low self-esteem, even self-hatred. I know I had my issues at the beginning of my 50 pound journey. Begin to pretend that you love yourself now.

2.  Look in the mirror and say, “I love you.” Aloud. Again. Louder. With feeling. Again! With conviction! “I love you!”

3. Fill in the blank. “One thing I love about myself is _______________ .” If you need to pretend to like something, feel free to pretend. Eventually, something will rise from deep within and you will say, “Oh, I really do love that about myself.”

4.  Email yourself a motivational postcard daily! Write it as if you are writing to a friend, “Dear Janice, Have a great day! I love you. – From Janice” (Check out Our Lady of Weight Loss’s ecards!)

Imagine the changes that are beginning to take place as you take the time to say “I love you” to you, acknowledging the good within you, and sending yourself a word of encouragement! What a journey! ~ OLofWL