There was a man whose name was Graham: Sylvester Graham. He was a man on a mission; his main thrust was to curb lust.

Graham (1794 –1851), the 17^th child of the Reverend John Graham was – in 1826 – ordained a Presbyterian minister.  He became an early advocate of dietary reform in the United States, and he was best known for his positions on vegetarianism, dietary habits, the temperance movement, and last but not least, Graham is THE man who put the ‘graham’ into the cracker.

Graham, a ferocious advocate for healthful living, preached that a vegetarian diet cured alcoholism, and even better, a vegetarian diet ‘cured’ sexual urges.   He believed that an unhealthy diet stimulated excessive sexual desire, which in turn caused diseases such as, but not limited to, epilepsy, pulmonary consumption, spinal diseases, insanity, headaches and indigestion.

Those who followed him, and there were many during America’s health craze of the 1820’s and 1830’s (never underestimate a good health/diet craze) were known as Grahamites. He urged his followers to combat their lustful desires by eating a diet that was heavy in fiber and devoid of meats.  Bland foods, he thought, curbed sexual tendencies like masturbation. (Well, maybe he’s got something there!)

Graham also warned that ‘mustard and catsup cause insanity.’  He recommended drinking water only, sleeping with one’s windows open, regardless of the weather; and he touted the merits of a high-fiber diet, promoting the use of homemade unsifted wheat flour instead of refined white flour, which brings us to Graham bread!

In 1829, he invented Graham bread, an additive-free bread, made from unsifted flour, thus inadvertently paving the way for the modern, asexual graham cracker that we know and love today.

The Reverend Sylvester Graham also helped found the American Vegetarian Society.  He wrote a number of books, articles and presented many a lecture on the Science of Human Life.   It is reported that ‘many women fainted’ during his lectures, especially when he spoke about ‘sexual relations’ and the ‘wearing of the corset.’

Fascinating, no?  And now, in celebration of lustful living, here are four (4) Kick Tush Graham Cracker Recipes from your favorite dysFUNctional chef, Janice Taylor (that’s me :), she who puts the FUN into dysFUNctional!

4 GRAHAM CRACKER RECIPES.

PEANUT BUTTER SURPRISE

1 Graham Cracker
1 Tablespoon Peanut Butter
1 Teaspoon Dried Cranberries

Spread the peanut butter on cracker, sprinkle cranberries atop.

***
HONEY LOVE

1 Graham Cracker
1 Tablespoon Honey
Blueberries (or Blackberries or Raspberries or Strawberries – any berry  will do)

Spread the honey on the cracker, sprinkle berries atop.

***
GRAHAM PUDDIN’

1 Graham Cracker
1 Tablespoon Pudding, Chocolate
1 Apple Slice

***
FAUX ICE CREAM SANDWICH

2 Graham Crackers
1 Big Dollop Cool Whip

Make a ‘cool whip sandwich.’
Wrap in plastic.  Freeze.

Eat when frozen.

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Spread the word–NOT the icing!
Janice

PS:  Dictated but not read by OLWL.  Excuse all typos!
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