Chances are you’ve heard about the Laws of Attraction. The basic concept is that you attract into your life whatever you think about.   Positive thoughts and beliefs create a positive life; negative thoughts and beliefs attract negativity.

One sure way to get those positive vibes swirling out there is to be attracted to yourself, in a healthy and self-affirming way (not in a narcissistic, oh my goodness, I’m the greatest ever, where’s the mirror – I need to look at myself again – kind of way).

Truthfully, if you aren’t attracted to you, if you don’t fully recognize your qualities and embrace yourself, how attractive could you possibly be to the universe.

One thing we don’t want to do is throw a false blanket of positivity on top of a basement full of unattractive thoughts and behaviors. Let’s get in there, excavate, STOP ….. and make some mind-altering changes and create space for the positive life that we are craving!

Top 10 Appealing, Eye-Catching and Attractive Tips
on How to STOP Being Unattractive

1. STOP doing what is bad for you!
Keep in mind that determining what is “bad” is completely subjective. So dig deep and be honest. Make a list of at least ten things that you are currently doing that are bad for you – from sleeping too late, to eating too much, to dating bad boys! Or bad girls, for that matter. And then STOP doing those things!

2. STOP doing what you others think you ‘should’ do!
It’s one thing to be respectful and responsive to others, and it’s another to live your life the way others want you to or think that you should! You heretofore have permission to lead your own life, the way you want to. No should about it!

3. STOP being so darn nice!
You don’t have to be ‘that’ nice all the time. You don’t have to say ‘yes’ to requests that you want to say ‘no’ to. You don’t have to smile and make small talk when you are exhausted. You can even be cranky once in a while.

4. STOP moving so fast!
Would ya’ please SLOW down? You’re making me dizzy. I know that we all want to get from A to Z in a flash, but seriously, you’re missing the nuances and beauty of the journey. Take in a deep breath, and pay attention to each and every remarkable part of your journey. You don’t really want to rush through your life and miss it, do you?

5. STOP trying!
As Yoda from star wars says, “Do or do not … there is no try.” Every time you say that you are ‘trying’ to do something, you are essentially making certain that you have a way out. There’s no commitment in ‘trying.’ How many times have you said, “I’ll try to make it to your party.” -or- “I’ll try to stop by.” Did you?

6. STOP measuring your success by comparing yourself to others.
Human beings have a need to make order, rank things, and create points of reference, because it helps us to make choices and set priorities in life. However, comparing ourselves to others is a trap. It only leads to jealousy, bitterness and a sense of losing when someone else is succeeding. There is nothing to compare. We are unique individuals on our uniquely individual journey.

7. STOP trying to be someone else.
As Oscar Wilde so fittingly stated, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Let go of worrying about how you others perceive you, think about you, or what they might be saying about you. In order to be yourself, you have to tap into and go with your inner flow. Be open and honest. You’ve got absolutely nothing to hide; nothing to be ashamed of; nothing to be insecure about. Embrace your uniqueness.

8. STOP reacting to life.
Take in a deep breath and start responding to life and directing it! You have an opportunity to step back and take an objective look at your unattractive knee-jerk, automated reactions to things. Take in a deep breath, and create a space in which you can take action that is in alignment with your future.

9. STOP doing the same things the same way.
At one time or another, we’ve all experienced what it’s like to press the print button on our keyboards and have nothing happen. What do we do when the paper doesn’t print? We hit the print button again and again and again, to no avail. If your life isn’t working as well as it might, try finding a new point of view!

10. STOP denying yourself.
It’s okay to be selfish. If the word selfish holds a negative connotation for you, substitute the word ‘self-full.’ Take absolute care of yourself – eliminate stress, do things that bring you extreme pleasure, give yourself the things that you desire, and take time to just sit and recharge your batteries. Not only is it a good idea to be self-full, it’s a generous act. There’s no way you can effectively help another, if you are running on self-empty.

What is unattractive about you?

Spread the word … NOT the icing,

Janice Taylor
wise * fun * utterly useful

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