I am not one to just to jump on the bandwagon when it comes to conspiracy theories about Hollywood, but NBC’s latest sitcom has given me pause. However, those like me who are concerned about the messages shared in One Big Happy shouldn’t be too concerned. It won’t be around for long. The show has too many flaws to be a hit. Instead, it should be titled, “What’s a Nice Cast Like You Doing with a Script Like This?”

Beside the fact that this show is not funny, (more on that later), it has an offensive premise. Lizzy (Elisha Cuthbert) and Luke (Nick Zano) are lifelong and best friends. They’ve been through a lot together and they would make for a great couple except for the fact that Lizzy is a lesbian. Still, the two play house together and after some heavy thinking, the two have the brilliant idea to have a baby together. Because…why not? However, the two don’t have sex together (they have their standards after all), they plan to have a baby the new-fashioned way.

Somewhere down the line we as a society have accepted the fact that having babies is a fun hobby and raising them in a stable environment is unnecessary. Are these two so naive to think that they will be together forever? Of course not. Both want to fall in love with someone else and when they do, they can take turns raising the baby or something. But hold on – it gets worse. On a night out, Luke meets free-spirited Prudence (Kelly Brook) from England. Of course Luke brings her to his home to have sex because the act of sex between strangers is completely normal. Then it turns out that she is an illegal alien who will be deported if she doesn’t get married. No problem! Luke is pretty sure that he loves her and within days, they get married in Vegas.

So, what’s this father-to-be and new husband to do now? Suggest that they all live together to become, (everyone say it together), “one big happy” family or a resemble facsimile. This isn’t a marriage anymore than it is a family but it should make for a funny situation comedy – right? Wrong. The pilot episode’s jokes are either tacky, tasteless or just lame. For an example, Prudence is very comfortable with her body and walks around the house naked. Lizzy is understandably uncomfortable with this and makes a few comments about finding “vagina coasters” since the new housemate tends to sit anywhere she pleases. Call me old fashioned, but I don’t appreciate vagina jokes.

The cast also includes Brandon Mychal Smith, Rebecca Corry and Chris Williams, which are all fine, but none of them really add much to the show. In fact, the best thing about this show is the casting. Together they could make a really funny comedy. Just not this one.

Much of the blame for this show should go to Ellen DeGeneres who served as Executive Producer and Director of the pilot episode. I actually like DeGeneres even though I don’t agree with everything she says or does. For the most part, she is a great comedian, a terrific host for the Oscars and does a fine job with her day time talk show. She is who she is, but she isn’t offensive, at least not usually. I really don’t understand why she thought this show was worth investing in. After watching it, you’ll wonder too.

One Big Happy airs on Tuesdays at 9:30 a.m. on NBC.