After Josh Marshall officially recognized me as an Aqua Buddhist this afternoon, I figured I’d better find something out about this Aqua Buddha. Who to call but my learned colleague Elli Findly, adept of all things Asian and religious. Sad to say, Elli had never heard of the A.B., though she did know about the Blue Buddha of Anger and the Green Buddha of Jealousy, both of whom figure in the Buddhism of Tibet.

“How,” I asked, “can there be Buddhas of Anger and Jealousy if Buddhism is all about the shedding of such unwonted emotions?”

“Not real Buddhas are they but figments of the mind, constructs you use in your meditation to rid yourself of those emotions. Project your bad feelings onto them you must. I think Aqua Buddha is about the Age of Aquarius.”

“So as an Aqua Buddhist, I’m projecting onto it all my emotional baggage from the 60s?”

“Yes. And none too soon either. Double that goes for your co-religionist Rand. Peace.”