We all have people we are attached to.  Some attachments are different than others – for instance, the attachment to our parents will be different than the attachment to our friends or partners.  As love addicts and codependents, however, we often find ourselves too attached to someone.  We can’t get over our last relationship, and we cannot let go.  Think about who that person could be or has been for you.  Did you get over them, or are you still trying to?  Now think about what is keeping you from letting go.  Often, we are so loyal to someone that it ends up hurting us.  Can you think of someone that you may have been overly loyal to?  With the right tools, you can detach with love, too.

So what does it mean to detach with love?  It means being able to take care of yourself before taking care of anyone else.  It means letting go of people, places, and things.  We don’t have to give something up entirely, though sometimes that can be the most loving choice for yourself.  Detaching with love is about doing what you can to take care of yourself in the most lovable, respectable manner.  It’s okay to let go, and to allow them to live their lives the way they see fit.  Think back to the people you chose.  Is there someone you need to detach with love from?

It can be tricky to discuss detaching with love, because there is no physical representation that we can hold in our hands, or explain the directions to.  This is one that we have to give to our higher power.  Our higher powers will guide us to the best route to take with whoever or whatever it is we need to detach from.  We can ask our higher power to help us detach with love, and to give us the strength and the courage to carry it out.  Go ahead and ask your higher power for help now.  The answer will come to you, but it is up to you to take action.  Maybe you need to text your kids less during the workday, or maybe you need to cut ties to an ex to get over them.  Whatever it is you need to do to take care of yourself, remember that it is okay to let go, and focus on yourself first. What action(s) can you take today to detach from someone?

 Sherry Gaba, LCSW, Radio Host, Certified Transformation Coach and author of  the award winning book, The Law of Sobriety:Attracting Positive Energy for a Powerful Recovery and Ecourse www.wakeuprecovery.com. www.sherrygaba.com sherry@sgabatherapy.com.  Find out if you are #codependent. Take my quiz.  http://sherrygaba.com/co-dependency-quiz/ 30 minute strategy session with Sherry http://sherrygaba.com/product/30-minute-strategy-session-sherry-gaba/