Relationships create intimacy and connection in our lives. They are important for our health and well being, sense of self and growth. With the growth of technology many of us are connecting more frequently and easily than ever before. At the same time depression and loneliness is a rampant disease in our society, which is posing more than just individual health risks but also imbalances in our communities, schools, political systems and long term survival as a human race. More and more people are starving for a deep sense of belonging and connecting.

Our first and primary relationship is, most obviously, with ourselves. This means that we are forgiving, loving, patient and accepting to our own nature and any seeming short comings and past experiences that we have had. We do this by exhibiting pure positive focus in our lives. Positive focus not only helps to manage and prevent high stress levels, but also allows us to open up to our families, communities and society as a whole. Our true nature will always be kindness. Kindness as an instinct has been proven among small babies that exhibit comfort and concern when other babies are distressed, attempting to comfort them by sharing their toys, food, blankets and other belongings. Even baboon communities have been studied and observed to evolve softer and more loving traits within their species, as soon as the alpha males fell sick and began to die off. The human’s nature is a highly empathetic and ultimately instinctual when societal frameworks are deconstructed. Human’s employ subconscious behaviors like mirroring, or taking on another human beings emotions, purely by being in the same room with them. The world as a whole, completely interconnected, impacts its own experience based on its exercise of its very potential as an infinite being. This means that we have the capacity for unconditional love.

Once again, without unconditional love for our own delicate soul, we cannot create intimacy in external relationships. Because intimacy and connectedness is so critical to our happiness, we must slowly begin to break down all barriers that stand in our way of unconditional. The most important step to doing this is living an authentic life. This means that we are in alignment with our emotions. If something makes us feel good, we do it. If something makes us feel bad, we are willing to face whether the experience is truly unhealthy for us or whether we are just flat out afraid of it. In the practice of unconditional love, we pulverize the blockage that is fear by recognizing that our need for freedom and authenticity is worth more than the fear itself. We choose love because it feels better than fear and for no other reason.

This practice of love builds upon itself in a manner which eventually transforms into compassionate habits and the ability to honor your own needs. Honoring yourself means getting clear on what’s right for you and what you need in your life to feel good, secure and happy. This is not a practice of denial, but a progressive devotion to joy and lasting peace. When we couple an authentic life with authentic relationships that are based on real values, we connect deeply with others and create a way of life that is not only in alignment with our true selves, but in complete harmony with the universe. Our entire solar system, all the cells in our body and in fact, the earth’s eco system, works together to communicate within a network of energy to meet its own needs. These systems do not produce their own sustenance, but rather work together in a giving and receiving manner, in order to maintain the whole. One, who practices unconditional self love, builds the capacity within himself to give that same love out to the entire universe, knowing that they are completely dependent on the whole for their survival.