Today is my grandfather’s funeral. Today I set aside the hum and buzz and happy thrill of traveling with my children and with dear friends and take a moment to say goodbye to Grandpa. Who I loved. Who I will miss.

Today will be hard. I’ve spent the last half hour trying to explain to Emilia that I’ll be leaving her with her Aunty Tanis and Aunty Katie for a few hours later today, so that I can say goodbye to my Grandpa, but she doesn’t understand, and wants to come, and it’s hard, so hard, because I don’t want her to see me that sad. Which, maybe, is wrong, but still. I don’t want her to share my sadness. I want today to be happy for her, and for Jasper.

So, I’ll do this part of the journey alone. As I must.