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Their Bad Mother

Jasper is, as I’ve mentioned, sick: respiratory difficulties of some sort or another that haven’t yet been fully determined. What we do know, or think that we know: it’s not swine flu. Which is a relief. Of sorts. We can’t really rest easy – indeed, we’re pretty likely to be resting entirely uneasily – until…

We had planned to make the big move – the move to the Big Boy Bed – last week, in the hopes that with the dawning of a new era of expansive bedspace for Jasper there would also dawn a new era of sleep for us. Alas, it was not to be. Jasper got sick,…

How is it that small children are even more adorable when they’re upside down? Does cuteness bend gravity in such a way that the very physics of sweetness are amplified when the object of sweetness is suspended in mid-air? Science is amazing.

We’re just not sleeping around here. Like, never. Jasper goes to bed sometime between 7:30 and 8pm; Emilia, shortly thereafter. Depending upon work schedules, the extent of laundry build-up and what’s on television any given night, my husband and I get to bed anywhere between 10pm and midnight. Which gives us anywhere between two hours…

That’s Emilia in her new soccer uniform. Emilia is now playing soccer, which, if I’m not mistaken, makes me a soccer mom. No offense to soccer moms – some of my best friends are soccer moms – but I never thought that I’d actually be one. My kids, I always imagined, were going to be…

Yesterday, watching that helium balloon aircraft  – that helium balloon aircraft that everyone thought had a child inside – float through the sky, I thought, there go all of my ambitions for my children to be fearless. There go stolen horses and gravity-defying stunts and building rockets in the backyard. There goes my daring. Once…

What happens when you try to really explain to a precocious, dinosaur-obsessed three-year old about Moses and the Ten Commandments: Emilia: Moses was this man and God gave him the Demandments on some rocks? Me: Stone tablets, which are like rocks, only they look like paper, sort of. Emilia: Paper rocks? Me: Well… Emilia: Did…

I took the children to the Royal Ontario Museum the other day. I told Emilia that we were going to see the dinosaurs, but really, we were going because I wanted to see the Dead Sea Scrolls and the scroll remnants of the Ten Commandments. Emilia wasn’t happy when we arrived and I told her…

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving. EAT MORE BACON.

I learn something new from my kid every day.
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