As we
age, we naturally change. Change, after all, is the essential stuff of life. If
we embrace it with magnanimous grace and good humor, as part and parcel of the
ongoing mythic adventure of our path, we stand to gain great satisfaction in
the process. 

Recognizing
and accepting the inevitability of aging does not mean giving up on any
attempts at improving our outward appearance, physical health, mental outlook,
emotional balance and general well-being. More than ever before, women of a
certain age are taking better care of our Selves, conscious of a newly mature
imperative to lovingly nurture and protect every aspect of our beings.

We
accept the responsibility for our own sustenance and satisfaction: physically
as well as mentally, emotionally and spiritually. My sister midlifers — many of
us for the first time ever– are pursuing programs of nutrition and fitness. We
are eating better, sleeping and exercising more, learning how to release our
stress, pursuing spiritual connection and allowing ourselves to fully express
our creative natures.

We are
working hard to stay healthy and active, and are, at the same time, more
realistic in our ideals, more accepting of our own perceived imperfections, and
more forgiving of our weaknesses. While some of us do go to the
starvation-botox-surgical-extremes of trying to stay forever young, in general,
we follow fewer fad diets and adopt more sensible, sustainable and ultimately
successful life-style changes.

We
gradually heal ourselves of old destructive patterns, stinking thinking and
nasty habits. And then, voila! The rewarding result of feeling well — inside
and out — is looking well. We wise women of a certain age know that there is a
difference between looking young and looking attractive — between, for that
matter, looking attractive and being
attractive.

It gets easier as you get older. You accept yourself for who you are – your flaws and your attributes. It’s easier to live in your own skin.

–
Barbra Streisand

More and more of us are refusing
to condescend or conform to the adolescent and exploitative standard of beauty
promulgated by popular culture. We do not compare ourselves with teenage models
or emaciated-lifted-stitched-tucked-injected-Hollywood-uber-beauties. It is
only a disaster to loose our girlish charms if we deem them to be the exclusive
path to beauty, love and fulfillment.

Our allure and sex appeal change
with time — increase, even — if we allow them to. A woman is never too old to
look and feel beautiful. Each age, each stage of our lives, has its particular
fabulous charm. As truly mature, secure women, we strive to accept the
inevitable physical changes that come with the passing of time and incorporate
them into the way we present ourselves to the world.

Self-aware, Self-assured, we are
transforming ourselves as we go. We glow as we grow into our full potential,
and become ever more becoming. Our reinvigorated attractiveness stems from
self-knowledge and enfranchisement. Our magnetic sensuality is centered in the
fulfillment and satisfaction of our Self-worth. We exude the intoxicating
appeal of women who are, at heart, pleased with our Selves.

The process of maturing is an art to be learned, an
effort to be sustained. By the age of fifty you have made yourself what you
are, and if it is good, it is better than your youth. 

– Marya Mannes

***

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of
interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.