This article is by my friend and colleague, Barbara Bizou.  

 

Redefining Midlife Part 2

The good news is that we can take this opportunity to look at life in a new and fresh way. This is a time to reinvent ourselves and make new choices based on what we truly want. It is time to take stock of our lives, reevaluate our dreams and goals as we make peace with what we haven’t done and take steps towards our new expanded vision.

The challenge is to look at the changing energy with anticipation. We can throw away the roles that do not serve and open to ones that contain more freedom to be ourselves. Time to set our house in balance.

Many women find themselves moving into new careers or careers for the first time. Power may be an issue. For men and women who have worked in the world this may be a time for more fun …freedom from the old roles we took on.

Real old age begins when one looks backward rather then forward, but we can look forward with joy and excitement to the years ahead and especially to the contributions we can make to the world.

Psychologically this is a new time of preparation for elder hood. Yet, there is a lot of time between midlife and elder hood and we need to discover language that speaks to this new era.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH THE TIME YOU HAVE LEFT?

1.Recommit yourself to speak in your own voice-unhampered by expectations or fear of what others will think.

2.Support causes which show respect and reverence for the earth

3.Be wild

4.Take time for yourself — slow down — transitions take time.

5.Cultivate a belief that it is safe to move forward

6.Give up “being perfect”

7.Develop a consistent spiritual practice

8.Feel the intensity of your emotions — seek professional help if needed

9.Decide to have a positive attitude

10.Clean house of negative people

11.Continue to learn new things

12. Travel — expand your horizons

13.Be physical — touch, hug, have sex

14. Laugh, have fun

15. Let yourself be supported by others in a healthy way

REMEMBER: AT THE END OF YOUR LIFE, YOU WILL ONLY REGRET THE THINGS YOU HAVE NEVER TRIED.

*****

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to thequeenofmyself@aol.com.