A few years ago, the National Endowment for the Arts
released a report about reading. I wasn’t surprised to find that literacy rates
are higher among children whose parents read to them at home. What surprised me
was that literacy raters are higher still among children who see their parents
reading. In fact, watching their parents read had a greater impact on kids than
having their parents read to them.

The kids are watching.

Now that I’m pregnant, I’m very aware of how my behavior
impacts this little life within me. There’s a list of foods, beverages, and
activities to avoid. I think I felt the baby move for the first time the other
day, on the heels of drinking a Diet Coke. It was thrilling, of course, but
also a stark reminder that whatever substance goes into me, goes into that
little one too.

My patterns of consumption don’t always seem as direct with
Penny and William, but if I’m honest, I know that my behavior makes a big
impact in who they are becoming. Their whole lives consist of imitating the people
around them. Before meals, I’ve found Penny crossing herself and saying,
“Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,” because our babysitter begins her meals that
way. Penny’s also taken to adding the word “super” (I’m super-excited or I’m
super-fast) to adjectives. Hmm. Wonder where she learned that one. One of
William’s favorite activities is cleaning. He would rather “help” me sweep the
floor than play by himself with blocks. Those are positive examples, and I hope
we give them plenty of those. But the truth is that they see the negative too.

I hear my own voice when Penny yells, “No William! You may
NOT turn on the light!” And I’m sure there are more insidious examples,
patterns of behavior that I hardly notice but that make a difference on who my
children are and how they learn to behave as they grow older.

I get annoyed by this pregnancy sometimes, by the
restrictions, by the sense that my body is being given away to another. And yet
what a privilege it is to carry this life into the world. What a privilege it is
to teach Penny and William how to live. And what a gift–even as I resist it–to be
watched by my children.