In the book of Psalms it says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made…. your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex. Your workmanship is marvelous. 

I began thinking about my relationships and why I gravitate towards specific people.. Is it because they are like me? Or is it because they are not like me? We have lived by these old adages such as “birds of a feather flock together” and  “opposites attract” so really which one is it? Or could it be both?

God designed each one of us uniquely and when we are children, we live freely by his original design. We are wonderfully made- those cute little mannerisms we may even see now in our own children. They way they say a particular word, their expression, their personalities, what they love to do…. If we are wise parents, we embrace and cultivate those traits that make them, them. We help develop strong character.

We begin making friendships early and decide rather quickly who we want in our inner circle whether we realize it or not. Often times, children gravitate towards familiar so if Sally’s favorite color is pink she may like Susie because her favorite color is also pink…. It it that simple. They find common ground and before long, they are BFF’s.

It becomes much more complicated as adults and popular opinion says yes, opposites attract. There is something that draws us to others in which we do not have. The void can be many things… comfort, security, and even traits. You may even know couples where one is out going and the other is more reserved. If values and character line up, this can in fact be a great match. One person’s strengths are another person’s weaknesses. Attractions that are coming from a healthy and Godly perspective can be enhanced and bring forth much fulfillment. We are to embrace the differences in others because it helps us realize we all are unique and have value.

However, there are some attractions that are unhealthy and even dangerous. It is important for all of us to step back and seek guidance from objective parties ( God, clergy, counsel). When we deceive and control others we are setting ourselves up for disaster. Real love covers and is not self seeking. We live in a world that encourages us to put self ahead of others. It has become natural to want all the comforts the world says we are entitled to. Because of this steady desire of my needs, my wants, my satisfaction we are more drawn towards a self fulfilling lifestyle. We follow the crowd and I have witnessed first hand others putting more value on material possessions than true character. It doesn’t seem to matter what you do behind closed doors as long as you have all the expensive ticket items…. the house, the cars, the trips, the bank account.

It is easy to fall prey to those shiny things but God warns us….All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature deserving of wrath. We all have done it and do it… doing what we feel like doing, when we feel like doing it.

Stop and consider the real motive… Are you looking for someone to fill only what God can actually fulfill?

Opposites are apart of life. The role they play can serve us well or lead to destruction.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres.