This past weekend, I attended a virtual birthday party for a lady who just turned 90.  Over 100 people were on a Zoom call to celebrate her.  The party went on for two-and-a-half hours with a full church service, complete with a sermon and lovely remembrance videos.  All I could think during the call was, “Wow.  What an incredible legacy she has left.”

Now, let me tell you something.  This nonagenarian isn’t famous.  I doubt her name has ever been in the newspaper.  During her life, she hasn’t earned large sums of money, nor has she achieved great professional success.

Instead, she has spent her life touching hearts.  So, many people thanked her for praying for them and with them.  One person remarked, “I’ve never heard her say an unkind word about anyone.”  Over the years, if folks had a problem, they would call her and talk to her.  If you spend 90 years just being kind, you end up positively impacting a lot of people.

So often, when we talk about legacies, we are speaking about the rich and the famous.  But does fame and fortune really matter at the end of the day?  Perhaps fame may make a person’s life more interesting.  And certainly, fortune can make our lives more comfortable.

But when it comes to our impact on this earth, I would argue that our worldly accomplishments are insignificant compared to our one-to-one interactions with other human beings.

For example, presidents on occasion give inspirational speeches.  We all remember the words of John F. Kennedy, when he said, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.”  Powerful words.

But President Kennedy’s words aren’t nearly as powerful to me as the example set by one of my church members.  This gentleman drives a developmentally delayed man to church every Sunday morning.  That is a real service to others.  Not just words.

We all want to leave a positive legacy.  Unfortunately, our vision at times can be short-sighted.  We become concerned about what we want in this moment.  We don’t think about our long-term impact on others and the world.

Below are some ways to approach your life so that you leave behind the best legacy possible.

Hold Yourself to a Higher Standard

We live in a world in which many people set low standards for themselves.  If they think no one is looking, they are rude and cruel to others.  They don’t pay their debts or meet their personal obligations, if they can get away with it.

If you wish to leave a great legacy, you need to set a high standard of behavior for yourself.  And the only way to do that is to regularly ask yourself the following question: Would I act this way if the whole world was watching?

The reality is that we all tend to put a good face on in public.  However, people of high morals and ethics act exactly the same in private.  So, choose to hold yourself to a high standard no matter who is looking.

For instance, when you send an email, ask yourself, “Would I be OK if this email was forwarded to all my friends and family members?”  If not, don’t send it.  When you do or say anything, consider whether you would be OK if everyone knew about it.  If not, don’t do it.

When you die, you want to have lived your life at the highest standard.  Of course, none of us does everything perfectly.  We all make mistakes.  We all do and say things that we later regret.  But if you try to hold yourself to a higher standard, you ultimately will have a more positive effect on those around you and the world at large.  And your legacy will be the best one possible.

Live A Life of Service

You cannot impact the world positively if you live only for yourself.  Of course, you probably can have a pretty nice life if you focus solely on yourself.  You’ll have nice things and take great vacations.  And you will have a healthy bank account.  But your legacy will be one of selfishness.

By living a life of service, your life will have a positive impact on the world.  Of course, our primary (and most important) obligation is to serve our immediate families.  I can tell you that without fail, every day, I do something to serve my husband and my daughter.  Serving them is a part of my life, from doing laundry, to making dinner, to simply offering words of encouragement.

But if we really want to leave a larger legacy, then our acts of service need to extend beyond our immediate families.  We need to serve our extended family, such as our parents.  We also need to serve our friends, neighbors and even strangers.

When we live a life of service, we make a personal decision to impact the world in positive ways.  That kind of life doesn’t just happen.  You have to be intentional about it.  Each day, you have to think of ways to serve, encourage and be kind to others.  If you do, your legacy will be one of changing the world for the better.

Be Kind at All Times

Being consistently kind sounds simple, but it actually is quite difficult.  It is human nature to lash out when we are upset.  As humans, we tend to be impulsive.  We do and say things without considering the consequences.  As a result, to be kind all the time is surprisingly hard.

It takes a great deal of maturity and self-control to be kind no matter what it going on around you.  I will admit, there have been many times in my life when a very nasty comment was on the tip of my tongue.  I have the ability to be quite cruel.  But I don’t act on those instincts.  That is because my priority is to be kind no matter what.

If you commit to being kind, regardless of the circumstances, it will be uncomfortable at times.  You will have to tolerate unfortunate behavior from others without responding in kind.  For example, I’ve bitten my tongue when I’ve received obnoxious emails.  And I’ve operated with self-control when those around me were rude and insulting.  I’ll admit doing so has been uncomfortable.  My gut instinct is to fire back at people.  But my ultimately goal is to leave a legacy that I can be proud of.  I want to be remembered as someone who consistently encouraged, loved and supported others.  Period.

Creating a great legacy doesn’t just happen.  It takes work.  It requires us to be intentionally kind and generous toward others, no matter what the circumstances.  Committing to that kind of life isn’t easy.  But if you work at your legacy, hopefully, when you are 90, your life will be considered a benefit to this earth and an inspiration to others.

Email: meerabelle@meerabelledey.com

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