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2024-05-08

Real Church Signs

Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church. If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns. If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again. Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
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A man dies and goes to heaven when Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates. Peter says, “You need 1000 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all of the...
A preacher visits an elderly woman from his congregation. As he sits on the couch, he notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table. "Mind if I...
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A man dies and goes to heaven when Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates. Peter says, “You need 1000 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all of the...
A preacher visits an elderly woman from his congregation. As he sits on the couch, he notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table. "Mind if I...
A young couple, madly in love, decided to get married. But as the wedding day neared, both grew increasingly nervous over secret problems they had never...
Three Jewish mothers are sitting on a bench talking about how much their sons love them. Sadie says, "You know the Chagall painting hanging in my living...
God first went to the Egyptians and asked them if they would like a commandment. "What's a commandment?" they asked. "Well, it's like, THOU SHALL NOT...
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A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?" The mother says, "It's my daughter, Debbie. She keeps getting...
This story cannot be found in the scriptures, but it is told that after his resurrection, Jesus appeared to an old fisherman. "I am Jesus and I have returned...
At a church meeting, a very wealthy man rose to tell the rest of those present about his Christian faith. "I'm a millionaire," he said, "and I attribute...
how thirsty they were after walking so far. They were not able to drink from the walls of Red Sea water on either side since it was salt water. Then,...